The Quiet Things We Usually Don't See
by potterafficionatada
Summary: Lily and James, and how love is about the little things that speak volumes, but only to the right person. R&R, please!
1. Chapter 1

_Disclaimer: I do not own any Harry Potter characters and all that stuff. Wouldn't it be awesome if I did? Piles and piles of money! Too bad I don't. Sigh.  
_

**Chapter 1 – Lonely nights and memories**

He sat near the tall window and fixed his gaze on the grounds that spread beneath him; the long stretches of green and stone he had come to love as a second home after all those years. He let his mind wonder through the memories, reliving some of them with impressive accuracy, until he reached the part he had been dancing around. It had been a few months now and still he didn't know how he felt. He heard his mother's soothing voice in the back of his mind saying, "These things just take time."

He looked at the clear night before him; it should be over one in the morning. The voice was still lingering in his head and little pieces of its owner propped in his thoughts. It was an ability his mother had, no doubt, once you met her she seemed to pop in your head every so often, with her beautiful smile and sharp eyes. Some people thought she was fragile, but that was only those that didn't know her. She had a petite frame and a fair complexion, but the main reason for those erroneous thoughts was her well-known heart condition. She had an unstable health, but she would never surrender, curse or act victimized; the sparkle in her hazel eyes was ever so permanent, "a burning fire that never ceased", that's how his father used to cornly describe it.

He sighed deeply. Images of his parents laughing heartily during dinner flashing before his eyes; there was always so much love between them. It was something even a child could understand. Since he was a little kid he knew what happiness looked like and he knew he wanted it. He remembered his father's face, the perfect image of health and stamina. In so many ways he was the exact opposite of his soul mate, it could almost be seen as ironic. While everything about her was poised and elegant, he always resembled a hurricane, while everything about him was grand and dramatic; she was always sensible and practical. It was incongruence at its utmost level, but no one ever said love had to make sense. He stretched his legs in front of him a little, moving his toes one by one like he used to do with his mother when he was eight and she sang him stupid songs about feet trying to make him fall asleep.

He let his eyes search the night sky for his favored constellations, knowing he could count on their constancy. A small smile started to spread across his face when the memory of his first broom ride passed through his mind. He saw it playing like a film; the smell of the best Christmas present he had ever gotten, his father's proud gaze when together they soared and he didn't show any fear, only exhilaration. The smile he didn't know he was giving began to grow until it reached a full-fledged grin and then he laughed. He laughed alone in a dark room remembering how his father said to anyone in the most awkward circumstances that "his son was a wizard with a broom" and laughed merrily at his own joke.

He continued to let the memories trail in hopes that somehow it would make it a bit easier for him afterwards, although he doubted it. He was never one to dwell on self-pity and he wasn't about to start. He found it appropriate that physically he was a mixture of his parents; his father's strong looks filled with his mother's warm eyes. He found it appropriate because he felt that inwards it was the same way: his father's playfulness, his mother's wits, his unwavering loyalty and her persistence.

He let out a sigh as he fought an inner battle only to loose to himself, deciding to return to his uninviting bed. He contemplated the idea of simply not sleeping even as he reached for his glasses, which meant that the decision wasn't going to change. He pulled on the shoes that had been sprawled on the floor beneath him and took one final look to the beautiful horizon, letting the breeze graze him once more before he returned the window to its place effortlessly as to leave no trace of his presence there.

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She had been walking tirelessly for over an hour, like she was supposed to. She looked at the many paintings on the walls; they all seemed to be asleep. She moved silently but she felt like her footsteps could be heard a mile away. She opened a door only to close it again. She walked a bit more. She opened yet another door and closed it. She was randomly wondering instead of keeping her usual route, feeling tiresome but still aware she couldn't just give up and tuck in.

She climbed the flight of stairs half convinced that it would be a waste of time and energy, the first of which she had too much and the second too little. She sighed not knowing why she continued climbing step after step. Usually she wouldn't change routes like this, but then again usually she wouldn't be alone: her partner on the gruesome work was now very much incapable of joining her so that was that. She reached the final step and saw that the door was slightly open and so, naturally, she glanced through the gap.

He was sitting there like some sort of statue, a proud Rodin stranded in a deserted classroom. He wasn't in his usual uniform, but in blue plaid pajamas pants and what seemed a very old ruddy gray t-shirt. He was bare feet and his glasses weren't on top of his straight nose like always, but beside him, so now she could see his profile perfectly without the wire frames interfering, his strong jaw line and muscled upper body. She would never admit it out loud, not it even to herself, but she knew he was handsome and at that very moment, as she watched him so undisturbed, he was much more. The light was faint but she could see him with startling clarity; she could see his unruly hair moving softly with the breeze that came from the window that wasn't supposed to be opened, she could see the very subtle smile that curved his lips so lightly that she had to look twice. She watched with marvel as the smile spread leisurely across his face lighting it up until dimples appeared and he let out one lonely laugh. The sound startled her and for a second she felt like a child caught with her hand in the cookie jar. It was like receiving a present you weren't expecting, she thought, the sound of him laughing; it was beautiful and clear, filled with honesty and emotion. She fixed her eyes again on him; his grin still broad as his eyes searched for anonymous constellations on the clear sky. His dimples and clear white teeth creating shadows to the stars he searched, his toes moving to an unheard song.

She watched him unaware of her presence, his relaxed demeanor not showing the slightest worry in the fact that he shouldn't be where he was. He looked a little downwards, towards the grounds now, and she saw that the amusement in his eyes had a tinge of sorrow in them and she wondered what could possibly be that had put it there. It was strange but as she looked at him now she realized she knew short of nothing about him. She wondered how could he be so public and yet so private at the same time. Everyday she heard people talking about him and his friends; she faked deftness and pretended not to hear, she had seen him doing the same more than once.

She stood there rooted to her spot: a statue in contemplation of another. She studied his quiet smile, and saw slowly the sorrow and amusement being replaced with something she couldn't quite put her finger on. Without any notice he ran his hand absently through his hair, making it even messier, a habit she said she loathed. He let out a sigh and crunched his eyebrows together making her heart skip a beat, and after a moments thought he picked up his glasses with a dejected attitude. She smiled as he turned a little to enjoy the view again and she saw the look of pure amazement over beauty in his gaze. She decided to move now because she could see clearly that he would and thus would reach her spot soon.

She didn't know why, but when she got downstairs she didn't leave like she was supposed to. She was, matter of fact, very good in doing what she was supposed to do. She was good in following rules and sticking to plans, things that most definitely were not his main concerns. But that night she forgot the duties and the plans and waited in a dark corner as he came lazily, but extraordinarily silently, down the stairs, and still without knowing the reason why she followed him as he walked calmly the otherwise deserted corridors.

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He walked feeling the need to sleep approach him softly; he walked closer to the stonewalls now, running his hands through the rough surface in a childish way. He liked the feel of it and right then decided that if he ran into a banister he would just swoop down in it. He chuckled at his deranged thoughts, so tired he didn't notice the faint footsteps behind him. He stopped after some time to speak to one of the portraits that was still up. He liked talking to them; those that had been inside the castle walls so long they knew things he couldn't dream of. He remembered when one of the older ones had told him about a priceless passageway him and his friends had come to cherish dearly and chuckled again. Another portrait greeted him and he answered sitting himself down on the floor to talk for a bit, the thoughts of his bed no more enticing than they were ten minutes ago.

"- Another lonely midnight excursion, James?" – The portrait asked with an amused grin, not at all disturbed over the presence of the teenaged boy.

"- It is a rather beautiful night, Nigel." – The boy responded simply.

They had a sense of familiarity and friendship, or as much as person could have with a portrait. James Potter stayed seated on the cold floor, his body maintaining its usual grace while the man on the painting told him tales of the old days and jokes. He laughed quietly every so often, giving the other some sort of satisfaction. James liked the paintings and he found it odd that most people never talked to them, that actually they didn't seem to notice them at all. He looked outside and saw that the hours had been advancing on him, so he got to his feet again and wished his oil friend a good night, reinitiating his way back.

_**-- XXX -- XXX -- XXX --**_

Lily watched him sit gracefully on the floor in front of a portrait, his arms holding his legs in front of him as he started to talk to the man in the painting; it seemed as if the portrait was used to him and even more so, it seemed they were friends to some degree. She had cast a charm around herself not to make any noise and was trying to remain as motionless as possible. She watched as he laughed earnestly. He seemed to have an aura of easiness around him that she had never noticed before. She listened to the odd conversation with curiosity; her beautiful face lighting up whenever he laughed or made a particularly witty comment. She studied him intently as he stretched his arms lightly allowing her to see a bit more of his toned upper body.

She thought about the girls that swooned at the mere sight of him and for the first time in six years she admitted to herself that she understood them. Sometimes it was hard to make her eyes not look for him, but the fact was that he wasn't hard to find; even when he didn't want to, he was the center of attention. She remembered the first time she noticed he wasn't really comfortable with all the eyes that tore at him; it had been a strange realization that maybe he wasn't as attention hungry as she had thought. It made her eyes look for him even more often. And now there she had, a one-night spectacle all for herself, James as James and nothing more. Lily always thought people showed their truer nature when they thought no one was watching and his fascinated her.

It was not an understatement to say that they had a complicated relationship; they had arguments she was certain could be heard all over Europe, he had asked her for a chance over and over again for two years and she had pretended to hate him for four. It was ironic how now that he wasn't obsessing over her like he used to, she found herself being drawn to him, like flies were to light. Memories arose and she replayed a scene in her head, still keeping her gaze upon him. She remembered being seated in a large armchair in front of the fire one day in the beginning of the year and he walked in; there was no one else. She had kept her eyes on the fire, a not so indirect hint for him not to approach her but instead he had sat on the floor opposite of her.

"- Hi, Evans." – He said slowly looking steadily at her.

"- What do you want, Potter?" – She had said dryly still maintaining her gaze on the burning flames. She heard him sigh quietly.

"- I just wanted to tell you I'm sorry." – He said, his deep voice with a tone so soft it felt like velvet and she turned to meet his eyes. "- I think I was a bloody fool, or as you may prefer, an arrogant conceited prat or toerag or whatever, and I'm sorry. I hope it didn't faze you much."

"- Faze me much?" – She had said in disbelief, her tone much lighter than she had intended. "- You made fun of me, tortured me exposing me to ridicule, not to mention other people, and even managed to give the dying blow in a prized friendship to me and now you tell me you hope you didn't faze me much?"

"- I never meant to do those things, I truly never did. I think sometimes it takes a while before one can really understand the effects our actions may have on others." – James paused thoughtfully for a moment as she watched him puzzled, his hazel eyes filled with floating flocks of gold. "- I can't change what I did but I can apologize. The only one that can accept is you."

To say that she was stunned was an understatement. She nodded at him, a silent acceptance of his plea for a truce. He got up slowly, his familiar smirk or lopsided grin never making appearances as he moved calmly towards the stairs.

She snapped out of her hazy memories to find him still seated and smiling at the painting in front of him. Then she watched he get up and start moving again. The day after they had talked in front of the fire it felt as if something had shifted in the air around them. They weren't friends but there wasn't so much animosity between them anymore. She noticed that he now didn't chase her, that slowly his infamous obsession with her seemed to be fading and their usual quarrels diminished drastically, up to the point of almost none. It was fortunate for her, she thought, because how could she watch him if he were always watching her?

**A/N: Hi there. I had this idea running over and felt like writing it down. Don't know if I'm going to follow up on it though, so please review and tell me what you think! Maybe then you'll get chapter 2! PA**


	2. Chapter 2

_Hey! I would like very much to thank my only reviewer; you really gave an incentive, so thanks a lot! I quite like the story so I think I will keep it up. So to you, and everyone else, if you have a little bit of time please review, it will make my day!_

**Chapter 2 - The First Snow**

She smiled quietly as she looked around; the usually crowded room was absolutely deserted. She could still hear the shuffling of the feet as people walked away from her. She was finally alone. She touched the dial, rolling it softly until it stopped on a song that suited her and she began to move along with it while cleaning the table and rearranging things. She twirled graciously and moved a stack of papers from one side to the other so that she could clean a specific spot.

She continued like that, dancing and organizing, humming and cleaning, enjoying the feeling of not having to think about anything at that moment but the mechanic actions she was making. She relaxed a bit more and took off her shoes. She restarted her lone dance, the many years she had taken ballet as a child showing in her perfectly balanced movements. She started to sing along with the song whilst she cleaned the table of its many discarded plates of snacks. She chuckled thinking about the many times she and her mom would cook together in their ruddy old kitchen, the music blasting old classics while the two of them smeared the floor with powdered sugar. She felt her lips curl up in a smile. It always happened when she thought about their "Kitchen Encounters", how her mother liked to call them. They were a cherished part of her childhood memories, one that she knew she could always turn to when in need of something cheerful.

The music changed and she heard Sinatra's voice take over the old radio speakers. She smiled broadly for the leader of the "Rat Pack" tone was trailing in the first notes of one of her father's favorites. She giggled remembering how she used to dance with him, standing on his feet in their clunky living room. She embraced an invisible partner and waltzed with him through the room. As the song died down she did a mock courtesy and let herself fall on one of the many wooden benches. She rested her back against it and bent her knees, moving them softly along with yet another music slowly. She chuckled again as the memory of a conversation she had had with her father over three years ago popped in unceremoniously in her head.

" Dad, what is the Real McCoy?" – She had asked after hearing the expression.

" Love, of course." – Her father had answered within a heartbeat.

" Oh, but how do you know, you know, when it's the real one?" – She continued. Some things were just to abstract for her logical mind to grasp.

"Well, it's easy enough." – Her father had said making sure he was looking her straight in the eye. "- You know it's real when you know that person would do anything to make you happy. And vice-versa."

"That's it?" – It seemed rather simple for her.

"If you have that, honey, than you're all set."

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He was running carelessly. His muscles flexed, his breathing was steady and his hair was as unruly as ever. Even though he wasn't in a hurry his run had a decided step. He was like that sometimes, impulsive, he might say. Reckless, others would. But in truth he was neither, for his movements were calculated. One could easily tell he was used to the exercise for he had impressive speed and hadn't even started to break sweat. A grin broke into his handsome face as he envisioned his target and if anyone could have seen him would have mistakenly thought he had just won a dandy prize. He stopped dead in his tracks, so abruptly that everything around him seemed to keep moving.

He walked into the room looking for his friend but instead his eyes met a surreal scene. She was there. Dancing. Alone. He thanked the heavens she couldn't see him for it felt like he was intruding in something very private. She swayed with the music and his jaws dropped in sheer wonder. It was perfection; her beautiful hair was tied loosely in a messy bun that seemed to go against the laws of physics, her green eyes sparkled in amusement. He was suddenly frozen to the spot. Watching her was like witnessing the first snowfall; there was a magical quality to it that just lifted your spirit.

He let his back rest against the nearest wall, his primary goal completely forgotten as he listened to her sing along and let out an elated chuckle, like there was something obviously entertaining right in front of her. She moved graciously and he found that he couldn't tear his eyes away from her elegant figure. It was mesmerizing. The song changed and he saw her giggle and accept the hand of an invisible partner. She waltzed freely across the room, thoroughly enjoying herself. He had never seen her like this; so free and relaxed, it was alluring to say the least. He told himself to take deep, calming breaths and tried to remain as still as possible.

She did a mock courtesy and he couldn't help but chuckle. Boy, he loved her. He loved the way she could always surprise him and that every time he looked he found something new and intriguing. She had the temper of an atomic bomb, the kindness of the innocent and the ingenuity of children. He smiled at the many contractions, because he knew he wouldn't like her to be any different. He watched as she rested her back onto the long bench directly in front of him. She still moved her knees softly and he noticed that it was a different song now. He could see she was thinking and he wished he could spy inside her mind, but he knew he wouldn't, even if he could.

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_**-- XXX -- XXX -- XXX --**_

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She opened her eyes wishing the day were ending instead of beginning. She would settle for just a few more hours of sleep, so she groaned when she realized she couldn't even have that. She dragged her body out of bed and wallowed in self-pity, as she got ready for yet another day of learning. Another uneventful morning with no one around to annoy her. She followed her friends throughout the corridors and pretended to listen to their joyful morning remarks.

As they entered the packed room, the very same one that had been hers, and hers alone, the night before, a furtive laugh leaves her lips. Snow is pouring softly from the ceiling giving the room a dreamlike quality and she feels like a toddler again. She scans the room and her eyes lock with his. It has been a while since that has happened. She smiles and he smiles back and, as soon as the moment is over, he turns his warm hazel eyes from her and throws a perfectly shaped snowball into one of his friends, letting out a delighted laugh seeing he had hit his mark. She went to sit and ate her breakfast. A fluttering feeling hanging on to her the entire day. As did the memory of soft smiling hazel eyes.

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_**-- XXX -- XXX -- XXX --**_

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She had left the room and it had become absolutely freezing without her presence. He let out a sigh, praying for his brain to keep that memory untouched for him. He wanted to keep that image of her so pure and beautiful, like the first snow. His eyes sparked with a mischievous thought and he decided that something so unbelievably perfect should have a monument in its favor. Even a fleeting one. An unspoken homage or maybe even just an acknowledgement that someone was watching and knew that the simple quiet things were plainly the most special ones. Then he concentrated on his mission. He smiled, satisfied, when a snowflake landed on his shoulder.


	3. Chapter 3

_Thank you for those who reviewed! I loooove those! Does it make me shallow? I don't care. hehe. But I guess I just like this story and wish people liked it too, so reviewers get candy! ;)) PA_

**Chapter 3 – A shoulder to cry on**

She straightened her black dress one more time and let out a loud sigh. She was procrastinating and she knew it. She had always been a fan of the word, but never one to actually indulge in using it until now. She shook her head lightly because she felt it was something stupid to be thinking about now. She was stalling because she knew what came next and what it was was facing the facts. She took a deep breath and let it out heavily before closing the door behind her.

The house was quiet now. That house had been many things to her but quiet had never been one of them. She had been there countless times before and she had come to know it as a safe haven, where people were kind and generous and the sun graced them for it in return. It was a warm house, mainly because warm people inhabited it. But not today. Today everything was hollow. She took hesitant steps and laid gentle prayers to the saints so that she could keep her head centered and her tears inside for at least a tiny bit longer. She reached for the feeble hand close by and entertwined her fingers with hers. That person she loved that had just had her life completely altered. That person she knew to be the bravest and sweetest friend anyone could ever possess. Alice. She was suffering and there wasn't much she could do to help her.

The service was simple and understated, much like the man it was honoring. He would always do his job perfectly, he would always finish his tasks within time limit and he would always help someone in need. And he would do all that quietly and without fuss. He would never impose and he would never complain. His family knew he wouldn't want grand shenanigans and long speeches, so they complied. His only daughter was quiet, which was unlike the usually high spirited girl. Her two best friends stood by her side at all times, as if afraid that at some point she would collapse. They grasped her hands to show her that they were there, that she could count on them, but right then, all she felt was the air becoming thinner and the walls becoming lower. She disentangled herself from her friends' care feeling the need to be elsewhere, anywhere.

"- I'm going outside for a minute, ok?" – Came her small voice, a pleading note hanging in it for them not to follow.

And the two girls stayed there, watching her walk, deciding that she probably needed the space and hoping that somehow she would find the strength to build herself over.

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Alice was sitting in a low patch of grass from which she had a clear view of the garden beneath her. She felt pale and dry. And numb. She let her fingers wonder over the soft leafs to see if it would cause her some reaction. Nothing. She searched the colors of the garden for something to tell her what she was still doing there, until she heard a crackling sound.

"- Hey there, Alice." – Said a deep husky voice beside her and she perused her surroundings looking for its owner.

He was standing there. James Potter. She had no idea why, but there he was in all his messy haired glory. He wasn't in formal wear like most people, but in dark grey slacks and a black leather jacket and what seemed a plain white t-shirt beneath it. She knew he had never been one to care for convention. She was surprised to find him there and yet she wasn't.

"- Hi, James." – She replied simply, her eyes inquiring her unspoken questions.

"- May I sit?" – He asked politely and she nodded. "- I just came because I thought, maybe, you needed someone to listen. Or maybe even, someone to stay quiet with." – He was sitting beside her now, he always had such poise and grace that even at a time like this she couldn't help but notice. He just had an air about him, something that everyone could see. He was one of those people you noticed in the middle of a crowd. "- You might not want to talk, and that's ok. I just found comforting to know that I could, you know? That someone was there, someone who understood." – His voice was soft and his tone soothing. He stopped talking and looked to the scenery ahead of them.

"- When?" – She asked him slowly, comprehension dawning on her.

"- Just after last holidays started." – He answered unfazed. "- Mum says these things just take time…" – He paused and she saw a hint of a smile play his lips. "- …But I've found that good friends and chocolate are quite handy too."

He reached his jacket pocket and took out a package of fudge. He offered her some with a hopeful grin but she hesitated.

'- Trust me, this is the holy grail of fudge, mourners number one aid to life!" – He teased bringing the package closer so she could smell it. She couldn't help the smile that crept on her lips. "- Yey! You smiled!" – He said pretending to chant and cheer but maintaining his voice low while he threw his arms up in a small celebration. She chuckled reluctantly and he gave her a sheepish grin.

'- You're such a goofball." – She said smacking him lightly in the arm as she helped herself to the fudge. He smiled back at her satisfied, understanding clear in his hazel eyes. She looked at him earnestly. "- Thank you, James." – She paused looking down and smiled a little. "- I didn't think I'd be able to laugh today. Or anytime soon, for that matter."

"- Anytime, Alice." – He replied, still smiling that sweet smile of his. "- Really." – She nodded at him, accepting his token of friendship. He then looked ahead again and they stayed quiet for a while. "- Can I tell you something?" – She nodded once more. "- I truly admire you, Alice. You know? Today, before I came, all I could think about was that what I admired most about you was that you are always smiling that big genuine smile of yours and it always makes everyone around you feel better and just a tiny bit happier. Hey, I'm not making a move here or anything… " – He joked and she snorted. "- But it's true. I was afraid you would lose the very essence of you."

She stared at him, locking her gaze with his. Never in a million years she would have imagined to hear those words from him. They were friendly, but they weren't very close and it just added to the surprise. And it was funny that he would come and be the one to tell her those things; ironically funny because of the many times he had been called self-centered and egotistical. Not by her, granted, but it was still humorous all the same.

"- I won't.' – She said still holding his gaze.

"- Good." – He said still smiling, his eyes so warm that seemed a fire was cracking inside them.

After sometime he slowly began to stand up. He patted himself, getting rid of all the sprinkles of grass that had clung to his clothes and offered her his hand. She took it and got up clumsily and she smiled again at her own antics without even realizing what she was doing. She looked from him to the garden and then back to him. And then unexpectedly he hugged her. A friendly hug that felt warm and full, as opposed to everything she felt. She rested her head on his chest and slowly but surely the tears came. She let herself cry quietly, knowing that there she was protected because he truly understood. They stayed like that for a while, until the crying was replaced by a subdued sobbing. He strained himself from her gently and bended his head a little so that he could meet her eyes more easily.

"- Ready?" – He asked.

"- Ready." – She said taking a deep breath and squeezing his hand. She then turned and walked inside the house.

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She had been distracted watching her all alone in the garden through the glass door when she heard movement near her. Three boys approached Mary and she was certain they would reach her next. Sirius, Peter and Remus. Three fourths of the most popular group of boys from school was there. And Lily hoped she managed to hide the disappointment that she felt over the absence of their missing member.

They approached her, like she had foreseen and she responded politely and, although she didn't say anything, someone noticed her eyes searching for him. She knew he had to be there if the others were and she had that feeling she always had when he was near. It was like she had a special radar that beeped every time he was in the proximity. And then she found him. He was in the most unlikely place and at the exactly right one, like he used to be.

She watched him drop himself on the ground next to her best friend. He wasn't wearing a suit or anything like it but still he didn't look estranged. He had this ability to always seem completely natural and at ease that was uncanning. She only knew two people in the world that could blow formality with such class, him and his best friend. She thought it must be one of those things only those that had already born in class could achieve. She carefully analyzed the scene in front of her: her best friend and that mysterious person sitting together. And then something unexpected happened. Alice smiled. Lily was bewildered and unbeknownst she smiled too. There were few things or people that could have managed that on that moment, and he just happened to be one of them.

"- He has that effect on people." – Came the elegant voice of Remus Lupin. He had said it so quietly it sounded almost like a secret.

"- Sorry?" – She muttered back confused.

"- James." – The boy beside her replied. Then he moved his head pointing to the duo sitting outside. "- He has that effect on people." He then paused as if reflecting about something and continued after chuckling lightly. "- Most people, anyway."

She knew what he meant. More than once she had made it perfectly clear that she disliked his best friend with force. She bit her lips and let her gaze return to the scene she had been watching ever so intently.

"- Seems like it." – She answered him. "- How does he do it?"

Her question was fair. She had no idea what to say and it was her best friend. And there he was, helping Alice like she didn't know how.

"- You'd have to know him." – Remus shrugged. "- I think you'd really like him if you did."

And with that he left and she was alone again, watching her best friend cry on the arms of that boy she wished she understood. But he wasn't a boy anymore. And he wasn't the prat that annoyed her constantly or who chased her relentlessly either. He was the mysterious contraction that inhabited her thoughts, every day a little more. Even if she didn't inhabit his any longer.


	4. Chapter 4

_Hello everyone, here I go again. Another chapter on this love story. I just want to thank all those that reviewed, I really appreciate you taking the time to do so and I'm a big fan of constructive criticism (and wonderful compliments too, of course), which is what you supplied. I tried revising the previous chapters as suggested (if you care to read them again you might notice) but I have a little confession to make; english is not my first language and sometimes I just stare at a sentence thinking "I'm pretty sure there's something wrong there" but I can't fix it! Blame it on the unusual roots of the latin language in which I was trained in. But if anyone is kind (and brave) enough to revise it and send it back to me I will be delighted to post it. So, there you go, my justification (it's not an excuse!) for some of my mistakes. But the typos really are inexcusable (only thing I can say I usually type everything in the wee hours of the morning...), and I tried to correct them, I swear. I promise to check more __thoroughly from now on. And please, please keep reviewing! _

_Now on a different note, one of you commented that the story had little to no dialogue and it was something that I planned very carefully. But now this is going to change a bit. I hope you like it! PA_

**Chapter 4 - Agreement  
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She had been in that same position for what felt like hours; her eyes were stubbornly trying to shut so she took another sip of her nearly undrinkable black coffee. One day down, four more to go. Four more days, she repeated in her head and for a moment she panicked and thought she would break under the pressure. She took deep long breaths until she calmed herself, saying it was _only _four more days and that soon she would be home with her family.

She looked around searching for something specific and found that an erratic fortress of books now protected her. She saw her needed volume working double time, as a brick in what she had decided was the southeast tower of her reign and engaged in a complicated maneuver to retrieve it. She smiled because it reminded her of the many times she played "Jenga" in primary school and she chuckled because she remembered her friends always accused her of cheating because she never lost. In truth she was cheating, she just didn't know at the time. But in her favor she had that she didn't do it on purpose, sometimes the magic would just work itself however unaware of it she were.

She flipped through the pages quickly and gave a satisfied smile once she found what she wanted. She gave a small sigh as to say to herself "here we go again" and pulled her quill closer refocusing on her unfinished task. She was trying her best, but the paragraphs didn't seem to make any sense and the words seemed to slip away from her. She felt like she was hunting runaway words and decided to lay her head down to look at them a little closer. She would catch the little buggers. Or maybe, just maybe, rest a couple minutes.

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He walked in the library feeling weary. Tonight was going to be a long night. He looked at the tall bookcases and couldn't help but admire the elegant volumes stacked in the cherry wood shelves. He loved reading, which most people would never guess, because growing up in his house it was impossible not to. His mother's collection was extensive and varied and she was affectionate and even a little overprotective of each edition. He browsed around leisurely but ultimately came up empty handed. He looked at the people still studying, thinking that possibly someone had already taken his intended book. There were very few students there, just a couple fifth years and someone buried in an avalanche of books. Someone with auburn hair.

He moved closer and analyzed the impressive construction she had erected around her. The elusive hardback he had been looking for stood placidly at the bottom of what seemed like a bridge of intricate balance. An amused smile played his lips at the sight of her sleeping amidst the books, her chest heaving up and down in a steady rhythm and her rosy lips parted slightly. He thought she looked stunningly beautiful, much like the princesses in muggle fairy tales he had seen as a kid. His breath faltered and he cursed himself for letting her affect him so.

He heard shuffling and looked up to see the fifth years leaving which made him realize it most be close to curfew. He didn't really think much of it, but he thought she might. He hesitated, unsure of what to do. He exhaled deeply knowing what was the obvious right course of action.

"- Evans." – He called tentatively. "- Evans, wake up."

There was no movement whatsoever. He moved closer and stooped to level his head with hers. He called her name again and this time she shifted a little, adjusting her head in her arm. He sighed. It seemed almost cruel to ruin such an endearing scene: a striking redheaded beauty in pleasant slumber while surrounded by her favorite company; books. He reached out his hand and gently pushed a strand of her soft wavy hair from her face.

"- Evans." – He repeated. "- Lily, come on, wake up." – His tone was low and smooth.

This time she stirred and he thought he had succeeded but after a minute of waiting with no results he saw he had been wrong. He bit his lip still unsure over what he was doing for Merlin only knew what her reaction would be like. He sighed and scooted nearer to her side.

"- Lily." – He pleaded in that soft tone as he touched her shoulder lightly, as he would a baby bird with a broken wing.

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She had been sleeping a profound dreamless sleep, the kind you can only have when your mind is so spent that it can't function for a moment longer. It was the kind of sleep that didn't make you feel rested, only late. She heard someone call her name but decided she just couldn't answer; it was too much effort. But then she heard it again and now she thought it must be a dream for the voice calling her name had the deep raspy tone she knew belonged to him. And he wouldn't be there, much less calling her name.

And then it came once more. His soothing voice saying her name, not her last name like before but her name. Lily. She thought her dream was improving but then she felt a warm hand touch her shoulder delicately, almost as if afraid of breaking her. It wasn't a dream, she thought, maybe a hallucination. Her eyes fluttered open slowly and floating gold flocks and swirling green mixed with hazel met her. That alluring mixture particular to one person only. James. She stayed quiet for some time, still trying to decide if he was really there. She studied his handsome face calmly and he complied with her silence before breaking it and ending her doubts over his reality once and for all.

"- Evans." – He said ending their staring contest. "It's almost ten. We need to go."

"- Ok, James." – She answered yawning as she straightened herself up on her chair drudgingly. He thought she was the cutest thing he would ever set his eyes on. "- I just don't know how I'm ever going to make it all the way back."

"- You called me James." – He replied looking at her with a suspicious, but nonetheless amused gaze.

"- You called me Lily." – She responded, hoping that he had indeed and that it hadn't been a figment of her delirious imagination.

"- I'll walk back with you." – He said after a moment's silence, his eyes lighting up slightly and she felt her heart skip a beat.

"- Thank you." – She said honestly and felt a small blush creep her neck.

"- Sure. Do you need all of these?" – He motioned to her reign of tomes raising an inquiring eyebrow.

"- No." – She shook her head chuckling. "- Just the north tower." – He chuckled back at her joke and she couldn't help smiling.

"- Oh, so can I take this one from the bridge base? I've been looking for it." - He returned and it was her turn to chortle.

"- No problem." – She eyed him cautiously while packing her things.

This was the longest conversation they had had in months and she was rather enjoying it. She watched surprised as he flicked his wand and the books she had mentioned stacked themselves on top of each other in an orderly fashion and floated beside him.

"- Impressive." – She said, cheekily complimenting his bit of magic although she still had sleepy eyes.

"- I try. Shall we?" – He asked in a mock gallantry tone.

"- We shall." – She answered with a small smile. She didn't feel so tired now that he was there; it was as if someone had jumpstarted her body.

They walked together talking quietly as he led the way. She could tell he knew the tricky stairs and long corridors too well for he took turns absentmindedly always knowing were they would end up next. Sometimes they would be silent and she would take advantage of that to discreetly look him over, noticing his crooked loosened tie and untucked shirt, thinking he looked even better ruffled like that. He on the other hand felt that she was more appealing like this, half asleep and soft-spoken. He would call her Floating Lily in his mind tonight, because he felt it suited her perfectly.

It was remarkable how the conversation flowed between them after everything that had passed, and they both took pleasure in the realization that it felt natural talking to each other. As they reached the entrance of their destination, he stopped and picked up the book on top of the hovering pile.

"- Good night, Lily." – He said simply, a hint of a grin insinuating in the farthest corners of his mouth. She liked the way her name sounded in his husky voice; it sent shivers down her spine.

"- You're not coming in?" – She asked startled and a little disappointed. She got an apologetic shrug for answer. "- Oh, ok. Good night, then."

She turned and said the required password, hearing his footsteps echo in the hard stone floor. Unexpectedly, even to herself, she turned back around and called him out.

"- James." – Her sweet singsong voice rang in the deserted corridor and he turned on his heel to face her, surprise clearly etched in his attractive features as he looked at her expectantly. "- Just... I missed arguing with you."

He didn't respond, just smiled at her one of those smiles that could make time stand still and nodded his head once as to agree with her. Then they each turned around and went their separate ways. But for hours to come they were thinking about the exact same thing.

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For the subsequent four days they lived and breathed exams and notes. It was a strenuous drill and by the end of it everyone within the castle walls was anxious for their promised time out. Seventh years were being hugged and hollered left and right for now they exited the protected walls of the school they had lived in for seven years and entered the harsh reality that occupied the world those day. While sixth years, like a boy with rimmed glasses and hazel eyes and his pears, went home with the prospect of enjoying their vacation before coming back to their last year.

As a girl with scarlet hair boarded the train with equal color with her heavy trunk, her head swarmed with different thoughts. Her family, her sister, her friends, they all hovered in disarray in her mind. And, of course much too constantly, a boy with warm eyes and messy hair. She thought about that night rerunning each part internally often. For the past four days they had been swamped and people barely had time to talk to each other, but they had locked eyes more than once and every time he had smiled at her, that kind of complicit smile that meant they shared something. He and his friends had pulled their traditional year-end prank today and she had laughed sincerely. Some things never changed and she was glad for that.

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For the rest of the week formulas, incantations and a girl with catlike green eyes disputed the space in his mind. He fought tiring inner battles to remain focused and won most of them. Not all of them. Before that night it was easier; he had no hope left and therefore it was easier to convince his brain not to think about her. But now, now whenever he told himself that he had to concentrate on something else, like exams for example, he heard her voice saying his name. James. She said sweetly, like it was wrapped in fine paper and he knew he wanted to hear her say it everyday. No more angry Potter's, but perfectly wrapped James' in the mornings

But now he was stepping on the locomotive that would take him back home, where there would be no redheaded girl with mermaid voices calling out for him. And he wondered if she would miss him, because he knew he would miss her. Deciding he needed to see her one last time, he slid the compartment door and excused himself hastily.

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She was having trouble fitting her things inside the compartment, already crowded with the other girls' things. They weren't inside now; it was only her and the complicated logistics of fitting three girl's yearly luggage in one place. She looked around scratching her head contemplating different solutions to the problem but before she could decide everything seemed to arrange itself properly on its own accord. She turned around to face her aide and he was there.

"- I hope that's ok." – He said pointing to the organized things safely tucked in the luggage compartment.

'- That's perfect.' – She answered, a sheepish smile on her face. "- Thank you, James." - As she said his name, in the very same way he had been replaying in his mind, he couldn't help the small smile that came to his lips.

"- So, I've been thinking and I decided I'd rather we talk." – He stated leaning casually against the doorframe giving her a stern look. She thought if her life were a novel, the author would describe him as dashing at that moment.

She looked completely puzzled and he smirked because it was exactly what he had expected. She gave him a questioning look and he obliged.

"- Well, you said you missed arguing with me, but I think I'd rather talk, if that's ok." – He explained, his golden eyes sparkling attractively. Now it was her turn to smile amusedly at him.

"- I'd say ok, but I think I might want to argue with you again soon. Maybe we could reach an agreement?" – She responded in a defiant manner.

"- An agreement? Haven't you heard; I'm insufferable!" – He told her in a sarcastic but charming way.

"- Oh, but I'm sure it can be done. Don't you know I'm stubborn?" – She responded with her eyes twinkling.

And while the train moved and people moved around in a hurry to say goodbye to their friends and other halves, two seventeen year olds agreed to talk and argue regularly in the future. And as he left her alone in her compartment to find his friends they both felt an odd sense of satisfaction and had a tingling feeling that the following year was going to be worth waiting for.


	5. Chapter 5

_Hey everyone! After a very stressful week I'm back and this time with the help of my new beta Sphinx, who is amazingly good and kind. Thanks a lot to you; you are life-saving, no matter what you say! I loved all the reviews; you people are just great. I hope you guys like it. PA_**  
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**Chapter 5 - Addiction**

Every bone in his body was sore and every last brain cell completely spent. He didn't know bones could hurt and he had never been so mentally exhausted in his life. But he was relentless and wouldn't give up easily. It had been over two months and they had not strayed from the hard training. In all honesty, he liked it because it kept him from thinking about other things. Things like war, love and hate and every other complicated thing that came in between. So, whenever his mind was about to start another endless rant he was glad he was tired. Blissfully tired.

But today, as his eyes flicked between open and closed, he felt his thoughts hover away from his control, as a snitch would sometimes; staying far enough so he couldn't reach it but close enough to taunt him. His own thoughts were taunting him; he thought he couldn't go lower than that. Her delicate face appeared in the fog of his reverie, the same milky skin he had dreamed of touching and the same inviting lips he had hoped to taste for so long. His mother was a scholar and he was a blue-blooded heir, or that was how he justified to himself the fact that he always thought that she was the most perfect masterpiece to ever exist, that Pygmalion would be ashamed of his Galatea had he set eyes on her; no artist ever had a hand so demure as to carve perfection such as hers, because her beauty simply wasn't something that could be replicated. It came from within; it came from all her flaws and imperfections that made her unique, those strange idiosyncrasies that marveled him and that, in the end, were what made her Lily. His Lily.

He remembered when he had noticed her for the first time, really noticed her, not her hair, not her figure or eyes, her. He was walking back from the kitchens one late afternoon his fourth year when he saw a young girl crying. He was about to approach her when someone else did. She sat by the other girl and he heard the youngster say she was scared she was alone, completely alone for the first time in her life. She felt dislocated, unsure and inadequate. The older girl had silently listened to her, all the while holding the other's hand and looking at her intently. Once the first year had finished the redhead had turned and, taking off her own necklace, placed a gift in the youngster's neck gently. She then told her she wasn't any of those things, she was just scared but it would be ok. She knew so. She smiled kindly and the young student felt reassured and left after throwing her a thankful look.

He had been bewildered for he knew how much the necklace she had just given meant to her for once he had almost damaged it and she had given him hell over it. Her sister had given it to her when they were toddlers, before their relationship had become so complicated; it was one of the few objects she prized. He had been impressed by her selflessness, or even more, he had felt admiration and respect for that unusual girl. She had touched him unknowingly, and that would forever change their lives. After witnessing the unexpected scene he began to pay her more attention, to look for her and, eventually, to fall for her, telling himself at first that it wasn't anything much, that it was just a habit, until she became a necessity. He needed her, yearned for her; he had fallen for her. Hard. It had been most unsettling at first, he had never fallen for anyone before- but after some time he realized that maybe it wasn't a bad thing, that it might even be exactly what he had always wanted, that very same thing he always witnessed between his parents when they napped together on the living room couch on Sunday afternoons.

He moved to lie on his side and winced because he had forgotten even the tiniest movement hurt like hell. His waking dream passed from the girl with emerald eyes to another subject, one much less pleasing. His parents. His father. His absence. He was lucky to have had a family such as his and he had always known it. In one short year everything had changed and he wondered if he knew exactly how much, not only in his life but also in life in general. He wasn't stupid, or naïve; he knew a war was going on out there, even if people tried to convince themselves there wasn't.

Sometimes he would wish he were older and wiser, that he could know what he didn't and matter. He wanted to matter. No, regardless of what some people thought, he didn't want the fame or the glory. Although in the past he might have, now things were different; he was different. He just wanted to stop the madness, to vanish the insanity that was causing the beautiful world he loved so much to collapse. To stop the senseless fall of people that had yet so much to do, so much to lose. He sighed abashedly and took long breaths of air trying to remove these weary thoughts from his mind. He was trying, really trying, to become useful, to be able to stand alongside those who were worthy and brave. He hoped that fools hope that one person could make a difference. And what gave him even more reason to nurture that inexplicable feeling was that he knew he wasn't alone.

He heard the door squeak lightly and he turned slowly only to recognize the familiar shadow of his best friend. The tall form squeezed through the thin gap between door and wall and entered the room with feathered feet.

"- I'm awake, Pads." - He said in a low voice and the other, although a bit startled, visibly relaxed.

"- Oh. Better get some sleep mate, tomorrow's training is going to be bloody murderous." - Came Sirius soothing familiar voice.

"- Yeah, I know. Good night." - He replied with his eyes still wide open. And after a moments thought he added. "- Sirius?"

"- Yeah?"

"- I'm glad you're here, mate." - He said honestly, thinking how much his presence beside him had been even more welcome these past few months.

"- Where else would I be?" - The longhaired boy answered earnestly. "- Night, Prongs."

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It was one of those days when everything seemed perfect; bright blue skies in that warm sunny weather and even a soft breeze, but she couldn't appreciate it. She was staring at two diverse pieces of paper, one holding news so terrible that she wished she had never seen and the other so opposed she thought the two should never be in such close proximity. The "The Daily Prophet" and her Head Girl letter. The horror a deranged man's fantasy was causing and the realization of her teenage dream.

It felt as though she was pretending, staying in her calm loving home with her hands tied, with little news of the world she loved, the world she belonged to. She was torn, for she knew that this was the last time she would really stay with her family and enjoy being sheltered from all the scary things that awaited her in adulthood, but she longed to be a part of something, to meet her purpose and she was certain it wasn't there, in that quietness; it was on the other side, where there was trouble and dread. She felt estranged now talking with her parents about mundane things, trying to fit in their reality while she knew they would never understand hers; inside the school walls she had found herself and comprehended just how much magic was a part of her. It was almost as necessary as breathing.

She thought about that letter, the one that came with a shiny heavy badge. It was heavy because of its meaning and the responsibilities it entailed, full of expectations and, dare she think it, hope. She was looking at the golden object intently, examining while she let her mind race. She had plans, many plans; they were what she did best. She knew she would graduate successfully, she knew where she wanted to further her studies becoming a healer and she knew she wanted a family. She also knew it wouldn't be free, like it was supposed to; she would have to fight for it, and she would gladly do it, for these were the things that were worth it and she would never let her future go so easily.

She lifted her head when she heard the sound of dishes clattering and sighed, her sister's foul mutterings traveling up the stairs. She wished she could hear Alice's contagious laugh instead or Mary's quiet humming. Or his voice. That husky tone that was low and felt like velvet in a sound, because it engulfed her in smoothness, in soothing. It was strange how now the tiniest most insignificant thing could remind her of him; the soft breeze at night made her see him sitting in the window that night, his unruly hair moving along with it; a book resting on a packed shelf, a little kid laughing whole-heartedly. She missed his warm eyes and quiet confidence, and the adorable dimples that adorned his cheeks when his smile reached his eyes.

She couldn't tell you exactly when it happened, but in the last year she had come to admire him. Of course he had flaws; she wasn't blind or stupid, but now she realized she had been prejudiced. After he apologized, he distanced himself from her, granting her what she had been asking for years: time and space. And with all those minutes to spare and all that room to wonder she began to notice what she couldn't notice before: James. She found that he had grown out of the boy she had known and into this strong man she had never seen but that everyone else seemed to look up to. People expected him to lead, to be great at everything, bestowing on him duties he never had asked for. She chuckled thinking that he dealt with the pressure and responsibility in his own peculiar way, but she couldn't remember anymore a single time when he had fallen short. He had that kind of charisma, a magnetic presence that drew you to him and before you knew he got you, you were in. And once you were in it was impossible to leave.

She remembered one of the rare occasions she had seen him studying; he was sitting outside with his friends, books sprawled between them and a look of pure concentration drawn in his eyes. But she could tell he wasn't there because of him, but for them. He kept quizzing his shortest friend, explaining charms and complex spells to him in the simplest way he could think of, never losing his patience, although she thought sometimes it would have been completely justified. He would joke and try to make his friend less uncomfortable about the fact that he already knew all that they were reviewing. She had thought he was an interesting contradiction: seemingly arrogant but intimately selfless, unassumingly smart and openly a jokester. Her curiosity was stirred by his complexity; she kept watching him, studying him, until she had become addicted. And then they had reached a common ground and he managed to hook her in even further, so deep that now there she was; many months passed without her getting her fix, making her imagine him everywhere. She would try to talk to an unsuspecting boy, find at least a temporary escape from her constant daydreaming, but in the end it was hopeless. And she knew there was nothing she could do to ease her craving, nothing but wait.

_**AN: So next up they meet again! R&R, please.**_


	6. Chapter 6

_Hello everyone, new chapter is up! Yey! Finally finished it! I hope you like it as much as I do. Thanks for everyone that reviewed and if you have the time to do so again I'll appreciate it! PA. _

**Chapter 6 – Game on**

She bit her nails for the umpteenth time and exhaled sharply. Anxiety had completely taken over her every fiber and the arms on the wall clock seemed to move unbearably slowly just to spite her. She stared at the object giving it a fierce death glare, hoping it would make it go faster somehow; it was always her last resort and it worked most of the time. Not today, though. She sighed dejectedly: six more hours. Three hundred sixty minutes. Twenty-one thousand six hundred seconds. The clock seemed to stop under her scrutiny and she turned her back to it, fighting the instinct to stick her tongue out at it.

She couldn't believe that her vacation was over and that in - she glanced quickly at the cursed clock again - twenty-one thousand three hundred forty-eight seconds she would be boarding the red train back to school. Every year she suffered the same predicament: the closer the beginning of term, the less she slept. And this year it was even worse. She had gotten that glossy badge she had dream of and wanted to prove herself worthy of it. But that wasn't all of it. She was impatient because she missed everything; her friends, her four-poster bed, the amazing food and magic. She missed the beautiful scenery and the halls swamped with people hurrying to get in or out of class, but most of all she missed him. She even missed the possibility of seeing him and that chaotic head of hair of his.

The cruel clock struck five in the morning and she wished she could be sleeping, for she knew that staying up would only make her a bloody wreck the next morning. Seventh year. The best of it all; the worst of it all. James Potter. She smiled widely at the sound of his name as she said it out loud in her room. The best of it all; the worst of it all. She wanted to see him desperately, but she was dreading it. He was the only person that could make her lose her cool within a heartbeat and the only one that could make her heart skip that very same beat over a smile. She hated to admit it but he always could get her hot and bothered. And now they had a truce, or something of the kind, an indefinable agreement that made her unsure of their relationship. She was sailing uncharted waters and she had no idea where she was going. She sighed deeply. She wanted to know if they were going to be friends or if they would only talk every so often. She wanted to know how to act when he were close, if she should talk, wave or nod. She cursed her ineptitude on handling social situations. She shook her head and thought that the thing she wanted the most was just to look into those caramel chocolate eyes that seemed to pierce her soul, to be near him. Oh, how pathetic, she thought disappointed at herself and let out a breath slowly. Pathetic? Yes. Truthful? Definitely. Sometimes reality was just too harsh and time too slow for Lily Evans to take.

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He was looking at heavy trunk on the foot of his bed. It was firmly shut and it held the answers for the upcoming year. He scoffed, if only those answers could be found so easily, if only they could fit inside a trunk, if only they were this close to his grip. He heard his mother's voice calling him, in that sweet but very authoritative manner few people could master, and grinned. He was going to miss her. But then again, he always did so it wasn't anything new. He glanced around the room: trophies and books fighting for space in the crammed shelves and laughing pictures and posters hanging on the walls. Home. He smiled a soft smile; he loved it there, he loved that he knew exactly everything about every little bit of that gigantic construction. And what he loved about school was exactly the opposite. He loved that Hogwarts was always a puzzle, with so many pieces to find and so much to discover. Every year never failing to be exciting and thrilling. And now it was time to go back, and although he wanted to stay, he felt joyous to be leaving. Not only because of the school itself but also because of the many other alluring aspects that inhabited it; well, actually one in particular.

A few minutes later he was sat on the kitchen counter eating his crisp waffles, dismissing the chair like he always did, chatting away the early morning with his mother and best friend. They laughed together sincerely, the comfort they felt in each other's company palpable. And he wished she could be there. He sighed wistfully to himself, as the other two family members continued on with their antics while his thoughts flew to her once more. He had the strangest ideas sometimes; he wanted to see her eating waffles and sipping orange juice in the morning, her auburn hair messy and her manners forgotten. He wanted her to be in the most ragged boxers and top she owned and he wanted Lily to be laughing along with him over whatever stupidity his best mate was saying that day. He wanted her to share conspiratorial looks with his mother when they thought he wasn't looking, her green eyes sparkling with mirth. He wanted her to be a part of his life. He wanted all of her, all the time.

His mate's bark-like laughter echoed across the house and he turned his attention back to the talkative duo next to him. His mother's eyes, the ones he had inherited, glowing with amusement.

"- Honestly, Mrs. P, why can't I just marry you? The way I see it, it'll just save us the hassle…" – Sirius supplied teasingly.

"- Oh, Sirius, don't you know you're not supposed to propose to a lady before ten in the morning?" – She replied easily in her elegant tone. "- Honestly, I thought I had taught you better than that."

"- You did, mum, it's not you." – James joined in. "- It's him. I swear; he's got bloody ADD or something."

"- James, don't curse! Where are _your _manners?" – His mother scolded, although she couldn't hide the small smile that was trying to break free.

"- I resent that, mate." – Sirius said and James snorted. "- Bloody unfair, that is. Sorry Mrs. P." – He said after receiving a glare.

"- Told you you've got ADD, Pads. She just scolded me for the same thing!" – James said, swallowing the rest of his waffle at once and then giving his friend a full-mouthed smile.

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The platform was absolutely crowded. Her eyes were scanning the faces quickly, even though she knew she would see him from a distance; his tall frame was unmistakable. She didn't find him, but her gaze met someone else's: a former friend, a lost confidant. His long black hair was even lengthier now, his lips seemed pursed together permanently and his eyes blank. For a minute she thought she saw something else in them, a glint of sadness, and she regretted everything. She wanted to reach out and make him see; make him steer to the right direction. If he only so much as tried, she would be there. But he turned away, the blankness back in his gaze.

She entered the enchanted train feeling a bit more tired, the sleepless night taking its toll on her, but she proceeded to look for her friends. When she finally managed to find them, hugging, laughing and gossiping were the three main activities for the following half hour. She walked in the compartment that was reserved for the Head students and greeted her companion for the year, a Hufflepuff by the name of Diggory. She left with him to fulfill her duties and whilst telling the others what to do, her eyes met with the pale blue eyes of a boy who seemed to always have a knowing smile on his lips. Remus. His smiled widened when he noticed her looking at him and she smiled back. After the meeting was over people left, she enjoyed the silence in the room, relaxing after completing phase one of her new function with success.

She walked the way back in contemplative mode, without realizing where she was going until she was in front of it. A childish carving on the side said "Marauders only" and she chuckled. Her fingers traced the outlined words slowly and she thought about just how much the life of all the people within the castle walls had been affected by those four boys in the past seven years. Their unique ability to alter everything around them and imprint their mark on everyone they met. They were something. He was something. No one that ever met him could ever forget him. She longed to see him, talk to him and hear his husky voice but she didn't have the guts to open that door, mostly because she didn't really know what to do if she did open it. So she kept moving towards her own compartment feeling completely frustrated. But as she slid open yet another compartment door to find her friends, her sight fell on something unexpected.

A tall boy with the messiest darkest hair she'd ever seen was hugging her soon to be ex-best friend. She couldn't help it; her mouth was hanging open in shock and she kept blinking as if expecting to find a different scene from the one in front of her. She stood there shell-shocked as he distanced himself from Alice while muttering something indistinct that caused the brunette to chuckle. Lily could not form a reasonable sentence so she stood there gapping like a stunned goldfish until words tumbled out of her mouth.

"- What…I mean… Wh-Are yo…?" – She stuttered in what she found to be her worst attempt to play something off.

The twosome in front of her then turned to face the source of the incoherent gibberish sent their way and as they did so, her eyes kept traveling from one to the other undecided over how to act. Since she couldn't do what she wanted (ogle James shamelessly) she settled for staring at a fixed point past them in the window.

"- Lily… Are you alright?" – Came Alice's concerned voice.

"- Oh, she's fine… She's just jealous!" – He teased.

"- I am not!" – She replied a little too hastily; her voice straining slightly. And when she saw the amused looks on their faces it finally dawned on her that she had completely overreacted over an innocent friendly hug, and she searched for a way to stop him from having a field day with her reaction. "- You wish, Potter."

"- Someday, Evans." – He retorted moving dangerously closer; his eyes sparkled mischievously and she understood what he was doing.

"- Better grab a chair, Potter." – She teased him right back but her lips curled up just a tiny bit. She steadied her grip on the doorframe, trying to hide the effect his presence so close to her had on her balance. She focused on not looking inside the impenetrable maze that were his eyes, for she was sure if she did her breath and knees would falter her.

He leaned in a bit, his lips inches away from her ear, so near she could feel his warm breath and smell the scent of his soap. Pine trees and peppermint. And something else, something James. She closed her eyes slightly and felt him chuckle softly at her action, which drove her crazy in annoyance and excitement at the same time, typical.

"- Is this enough bantering for you, Lily?" – He whispered with that velvet husky tone, his voice so low that it sent shivers down her spine. She bit her lip and lifted an eyebrow at him.

"- For now." – She answered in the same low whisper, forgetting her best friend was even in the room, being proud of herself for being able to form a complete sentence, even if it wasn't the most articulate one.

He watered his lips at the close sight of her rosy ones, using all of his will power not crash his mouth into hers.

"- Ok, then." – He said stepping away from her and towards the door, his hands safely tucked in his jeans pockets. "- Bye, Alice." – He paused a little. "- Lily." – And he turned to leave just after the brunette replied, but just before sliding the door shut he turned back. "- Congratulations by the way. Knew you'd get it." – He told her, motioning for the badge pinned on her chest and smiling that lopsided grin of his she had been missing for so long, too long. And before she knew it, the door was shut; he was gone, and he didn't hear her say quietly "- Thank you, James."

- - - XXX - - - XXX - - - XXX - - -

He sat with his friends and smiled the rest of the way back. He had seen something in her eyes today, something that allowed his hopes to get just a little bit higher. He closed his eyes for a moment and rested his head against the window remembering how it had felt to be so close to her, the proximity so intimate that he could count the small freckles in her delicate nose. He smiled and clicked his knuckles one by one, making them pop. She was just so beautiful, so unbelievably beautiful, and she didn't really know it. He had found it incredibly hard to leave her, but he knew he had to. She was softening up, opening a little hole in her armor and he wouldn't miss the opportunity over a rushed decision. He was going to make the best of it, he was going all the way.

"- What are you smiling about, mate?" - Peter's squeaky voice interrupted.

"- Just... The game's on, Wormie." - He said his eyes twinkling.

"- What game?"

"- The only one that matters." - James said and didn't explain any further, just went back to reliving his encounter with Lily.

- - - XXX - - - XXX - - - XXX - - -

The beginning of term feast was the same as always, except this year she could not sit still for a single minute and she knew exactly why. She pretended to pay attention to what the headmaster was saying, clapped at appropriate times and smiled accurately. But her mind was lost somewhere else; running towards the boy seated three sits from her left. She felt her eyes straining towards him again but caught them in time and focused her gaze at the roast in front of her instead. He was even taller this year and he also seemed more toned. She noticed many girls looking him and his friends over and giggling, their conversation topic not hard to guess. For a second she hated them; their openness and availability seemed to be alluring qualities to most boys. But then she caught his eye and he gave her a shy, almost unnoticeable smile, one she had never seen him give before, and it all went away. In fact the entire world went away and to Lily Evans for a whole minute, there were only two people in the world – her and the bespectacled boy with the sweetest smile in the world.

When she went to bed that night she felt her jaw muscle hurt and realized it was because she had been smiling for the longest time. She kept thinking about their meeting on the train, his fresh scent, warm breath and hypnotizing eyes and that bloody sexy smirk. The way he had teased her had been so familiar and yet completely different: a perfectly calculated dose of flirtation inside each word. In fact, everything about their little encounter now seemed to say "Part 1", and she knew he knew it too, and now she actually thought about it she thought it all had been his plan exactly. Lord knew he was sneaky enough to pull it off. Either way she smiled; she couldn't wait for "Part II".


	7. Chapter 7

_Hi everyone! Long time no see! Thanks you all that reviewed last chapter: its great help to know what you think and also special thanks to my superbeta Sphynx, who helped me a lot on this chapter particularly: this one was kind of a struggle, but I do hope you like it. If you can spare a couple minutes please review and let me know. PA_

**Chapter 7 - Common Sense**

He pushed his feet off the ground effortlessly and within seconds felt the warm wind cover his body like a familiar blanket. Immediately the knots on his back seemed to undo themselves and the thoughts to scatter from his head. Already the week was almost over and he needed to unwind. He opened his arms as widely as possible and took a deep breath, taking in the freshness of the air and promptly feeling renewed. He moved around for some time; swirled, plunged and raced absent-mindedly for to him this was like a second nature. He looked ahead and saw that one of his favorite shows would be starting soon so he went to the best seat in the house. He sat on top of the tall metal ring while muttering something under his breath so that his broom stayed within reach. He looked at the beautiful grounds surrounding him and then to the slowly fading blue sky and sighed. Sanctuary. Up there, away from prying eyes and worrying friends, everything gained a different perspective and he felt he could see more clearly. Looking down made things seem more simple: he felt a sense of amazement over the perfection of the world around him; how every small being and living organism seemed to know their role and how life carried on even when he felt the world was falling apart. He remembered sitting at that exact spot the day he came back from his vacation, the first time his father hadn't been there to wave him goodbye and somehow staring at such untouched beauty had helped him heal a little. Up there his problems seemed small and fleeting and it gave him a strange sense of calmness, so much so that he couldn't deny the existence of a higher power.

He chuckled when a small bird flew past him and shot him what he thought to be an odd glance. He looked straight ahead and noted the blue hues starting to tinge with other colors. He dropped himself of the ring, holding on with both hands, letting his body stretch completely as if it were no effort at all to support his weight. He pressed his lips and did a chin up: easy. He stretched again and then began to elevate his legs so that they were absolutely straight and perpendicular to his waist and held them there for a while before letting them back down; a little harder. He pressed his lips harder together and began to rock slowly back and forward until he had reached enough momentum and did a 360º circle. He smiled when he got back to his stretching position and then with no trouble dropped his body down so that now he was sitting on the bottom of the ring, which he found a little more comfortable. It was a game he and Sirius usually played, one in which there were no prizes, just the satisfaction of competing against each other - whoever did more chin-ups, spins or whatever won. They had come up with it three years ago. Of course Remus hated it; it was, according to his lycanthrope friend, dangerously stupid. All the more reason for the other two to love it. He smiled thinking about his sensible friend's recurrent "dad glare", one he no doubt would be receiving had he witnessed James' little display of fun. He gripped the metal pole a little stronger and stretched one leg up looking ahead in awe; orange, pink and purple tints filling the vastness ahead of him and again he felt it was impossible not to believe in magic. He didn't understand how anyone could not see it when it was splashed in front of them so clearly. But then again, sometimes people chose not to look; chose which truth and world to believe in and keep living their lives like nothing out of the ordinary ever happened.

The shifting clouds covered the retreating sun partially and the lights began to redden. He looked at the odd shapes that were forming in the mist and started to play trying to find objects and animals in them (something he always did in his first year with Peter). Horntail Hungarian Dragon. Broom. A fat woman with a strange hat. Small sausage dog. Weird three-legged centaur. Flower.

He sighed. Not just any flower; a lily. Wherever he was he could never escape her. It was like she was imprinted in him, linked so deeply within he could never really have her out without costing him too much. Not that he would ever want to. He bit his lip thinking as he watched the lily-cloud dissolve into thin air; this year things were different; he could feel her sparkling eyes following him sometimes, something he never thought would happen. He didn't really know what had made her look at him differently, but he could tell she did. That didn't mean that she felt the same way he did, though. He sighed again and ran a hand through his hair: a nervous habit of his. Maybe she didn't feel the same yet, but he guessed the changes in her behavior meant he had a shot, and James, the ever-incurable believer, hoped a shot was all it took. And he knew they had to get to know each other first: because although he appeared to be a very open person, that really wasn't the case. To really know him was somewhat difficult, for he was weary of the many popularity-hungry people that fawned over him. And she was even more difficult, for despite her fiery temper, she was downright shy. Another lovely contradiction of hers, one of the many that contributed to sustaining the spell she had on him.

He squinted his eyes, as if doing so he could remember better his moments with her these last few days. They had had a few classes together; in each one they had carefully eyed each other, and sometimes even had exchanged witty banters, in a 90 teasing, 10 flirting kind of way. He liked their little exchanges, because they really were an improvement from their previous relationship, and he could feel that with each passing day she felt a little more comfortable talking to him.

Hence everyday was a small victory because as the days passed he was one tiny step closer to his goal. Even so, he was still well aware that his task was not an easy one; it would take him time and patience. He grinned widely as the sun set completely behind the woods, and stars glowed faintly in the rapidly changing scenery. He was smiling because he knew one thing would never change: he would always wait for her.

-- -- -- -- --

She sat there in the quiet room and stared at the wall while shivering slightly; the blankness of these kinds of rooms always gave her the creeps. She rested her back against the pillows on the bed: while analyzing her surroundings more carefully. White walls, white bed, white sheets. She chuckled; she wouldn't be surprised if she had somehow turned white too. She shifted her position and noticed another empty bed near the window and moved swiftly at the chance of looking over something with color in it. Her arm hurt when she moved but she made no sound trying to complete her small escapade. Smiling, she plopped herself on top of the soft mattress and fixed her gaze out the window. It was almost sunset and the sky colors were changing like a slowly spreading watercolor and she couldn't help but gape at the beauty of it.

She rubbed her eyes a little, because she thought a small dark figure had just zoomed across the pitch. She shook her head thinking that she was seeing him everywhere, but then the shadowy form appeared again, this time in a slower rhythm. It was moving leisurely across the sky, like it was the most natural thing in the world to be on top of that wooden stick at high speed and she was certain; it was him. No one else had that same ease and grace flying. She watched entranced as he did a dive and his head almost touched the Black Lake water. She couldn't hear him or even properly see him and she wished she could. There was something particular about him she had noticed: whenever he was doing something he really loved he got a special sparkle in his eyes that made them golden. She sighed and looked at her healing arm; there was no way she was leaving that room. She bit her lip and looked for his silhouette outside. Her eyes widened when she found him sitting on top of one the rings that served as a goal post. The scene had a surreal quality - like in a Magritte painting, the lighting gave him and the metal ring a special aura and the color explosion in the horizon made it even more impossible. Suddenly she let out a silent scream; he was no longer sitting, but holding on to the ring with both hands. She thought he had been falling but she soon realized that his actions were intentional. He pushed himself up until his head had passed the metal ring quickly and then he was back in a stretched position. She held her breath unknowingly; was he trying to scare her to death? - She berated him in her mind. But of course she knew he had no idea that she was even watching him. He lifted his legs ups in a gymnastics movement and then started to sway gently as if the wind was rocking him. She had to admit she was scared; he was being reckless. She watched him do a 360º and gasped in shock. And when he easily sat back on the ring, like it was the most normal thing to do she had to force herself to breath evenly to slow her heart rate.

She watched the sunset, exactly like how he was doing. In a way it was as if they were watching it together, she thought. He was absolutely bloody mental, she was positive, for no one in their right mind would swing themselves on elevated metal rings just for kicks like he had just done. But she was smiling instead of frowning. It was one of the things she liked most about him: his unpredictability. Life was never dull with him around; there was always laughter and warmth. She leaned back a bit in her bed, wishing it were a little more comfortable but knowing hospital beds never were, and thought of their interaction the past few days. It was like they were building the ground to a relationship, though what kind of relationship she was still unsure of. She did, of course, pick up on the light flirtation exchanged in their everyday bantering, but still he wasn't being as open as he used to and she found it, quite frankly, to be nerve-racking. She sighed and refocused her eyes outside looking for him, but it was dark now and his dark shape was nowhere in sight. She closed her eyes gently and sunk in the warm sheets and let her chest heave with her steady breathing while the image of his bespectacled eyes floated in her mind; she wanted to know him, to understand the many paradoxes that seemed to make him. She chuckled lightly thinking about how much her life had changed. Never in a million years she would have imagined this day; the day Lily Evans sat in bed daydreaming of one James Potter.

-- -- -- -- --

He talked and laughed with his friends like was customary but his eyes betrayed him. They kept glancing around the room, looking for that flash of red hair to enter at any moment but it never did. He had barely seen her all day and he felt that this affected him way too much. He ate the stack of food piled in front of him with less enthusiasm than usual because he couldn't help but be worried about her; she wasn't one to skip meals. When he lifted his gaze to look for her again, he was met by a pair of amused black eyes.

"- She's in the hospital wing, James." - Alice's clear voice rang and he chuckled back although she had startled him a little.

"- Oh." - He said with a shy smile; he had definitely been caught red-handed this time. "- Is she OK?"

"- Fine." - Alice said, traces of laughter in her tone. "- Might be a little hungry, though. You know Madame Pomfrey never lets us bring food in there and Lils hates the wing's sucky Jell-O."

"- Who doesn't?" - He replied widening his eyes and making a face, which made Alice laugh openly this time.

- - - - - - - -

She was trying to read the same page of her potions book for the fifth time but could not concentrate. She blamed the lack of food or the pain in her arm that meant her bones were mending, but she knew neither were the real cause of her lost focus. The cause had messy hair, glasses and infuriatingly cute dimples. She pressed her eyes shut for a second and huffed, exasperated at her own behavior. She didn't want to become another silly schoolgirl with a silly schoolgirl crush. She was Lily Evans for crying out loud. She bit her lip and counted to ten slowly then returned her attention to the discarded book on top of her legs. _To properly brew Felix Felicis it is necessary a long period of days, in which the potion maker has to keep careful track of... Why would he sit on that ring? That boy is bloody mental. But he is fit, that's for sure. He is not a boy._ She huffed and looked at the blank wall feeling stupid and then repeatedly hit her head against the wall behind her lightly, sighing deeply.

She heard muffled voices from behind the curtains and tried to distinguish them with no success, they were too far from her bed. She could distinctively hear though what she thought was Madam Pomfrey chuckling and then just plainly giggling. Lily's curiosity was sparked: the young nurse was usually a serious person and she wondered just what those closed curtains were concealing. She leaned in on her bed trying to see between the extended fabrics and nearly lost her balance in the process. Damn unsteady hospital beds.

"- Alright there, Evans?" – Came an amused voice, causing her to jump in her seat.

"- James!" – She looked at him feeling completely astonished and embarrassed at the compromising position he found her in.

"- Hi." – He said smiling at her softly.

"- Erm…. hi." – She responded awkwardly, unsure of what to say. "- What are you doing here?"

"- I heard Pommie was keeping you hostage and forcing you to eat that horrendous yellow goo she calls Jell-O so I decided to come to your rescue." – He said in a hushed voice; his lips twitching upwards making the same dimples Lily was obsessing about moments before to appear, making him even more appealing.

"- Really?" – She asked him laughing quietly at his explanation, still wondering if he was really there, if that was really happening. "- And just how do you plan on doing so?"

"- First, we're going to have a delicious banquet" – He said taking out an alarming amount of food out of his robes pockets (most of which, to Lily's pleasure, had ridiculous amounts of chocolate in them) that definitely wouldn't fit there if it weren't for magic. "- Then, after your fully recovered, we're making a run for it." – He finished with his eyes sparkling with mischievousness.

"- That's a very daring plan, Mr. Potter." – She responded grabbing a treacle tart. "- A bit daft, but very daring."

"- Well, I'm a daring man." – He replied giving her a stern look while picking up a rather large piece of brownie. She chuckled. "- Slightly daft, but very daring."

"- Seems like it." – She said looking outside; her eyes lingering on the moonlit metal ring.

"- That's quite a view." – He said, his eyes narrowed, its gold flecks swirling dangerously.

"- I couldn't tell you what I've seen through it." – She replied sustaining his gaze, her perfectly shaped eyebrows raising defiantly.

They both munched on quietly for a little, her eyes kept glancing at him and she could see him trying to hide a pleased grin inside. She opened her mouth twice wanting to ask him something, but in the end nothing came out.

"- Just ask me already." – He said snapping her out of her thoughts and back to the awkward tension filled room.

"- Why did you do it?" – She said letting out a breath.

"- Why wouldn't I?" – He shrugged nonchalantly.

"- Because it's pointless, crazy and bloody stupid?" – Her green eyes fired sparks in his direction; she was intrigued but also a little worried at his recklessness and she hoped that it wasn't all that obvious in her tone.

"- Well, Miss Evans, I thought that out of everyone you'd be the one to know those things have never stopped me before. Have you been talking to Remus? You sound just like him." – He said in an amused sort of way.

"- It's just common sense, Mr. Potter." – She replied before sipping on her water.

"- Common sense is just a way people have to keep you from doing what you want, sometimes even what you need. It's unwritten rules, and you know how I feel about rules." – He surprised her with the finality in his voice. Sighing, he paused and ran a hand through his hair. She studied his handsome features and noticed his eyebrows crunched together in a way she knew meant he had something in his mind. "- Are you quite done?"

"- Eating? Yes, yes I'm quite done." – Lily put down her hands, resting them on top of her legs expectantly.

She watched him as he scooted closer, her heart rate accelerating considerably as his familiar scent intoxicated her. His eyes sparked with mirth and she felt herself smile at him unwillingly.

"- How fast of a runner are you, Lily Flower?" – He asked raising a single eyebrow in that attractive way only he could get perfectly right.

"- Well, you for one could never catch me." – She answered cheekily and he snorted in returned.

"- Let's see if you put your feet where your mouth is, little Miss Cheek; you have ten seconds after I close the door behind me." – He whispered back.

"- Hope you got your running shoes on, James." – She said just as he was closing the curtains in front of him and he winked back at her, making her chuckle. Sometimes he could be unbearably cute.

- - - - - - - -

He waited for her with his back against the old tapestry, his eyes gleaming and his grin wide. They had talked and laughed together and she had called him James. Not Potter. James. Merlin, he loved that. He let out a loud sigh. Maybe things wouldn't be so hard. Maybe this game wasn't chess, in which you could only win if you conquered the other, maybe this game was something else entirely, in which they were both striving towards the same goal, trying to make out the best strategies only to end up in the same place. Maybe, just maybe he wasn't playing against her, but alongside her.

- - - - - - - -

She was giddy. One. She was trying hard not to laugh out loud because honestly she could not believe what just happened. Three. She could still smell the pine trees and the peppermint he had left in the air and hear his chuckle. Five. She bit her lip and then let out a loud sight; she let her feet touch the floor and she put herself in her best running position. Eight. Time is almost up. She closed her eyes tightly and took a sharp intake of breath and repeated in her head "Don't think, just run.", because it was what her dad used to tell her whenever they were playing catch when she was little. Ten.

She flew past him, running like there was no tomorrow, her fiery hair streaming behind her creating a soft breeze and he had to laugh before allowing himself to run after her. He caught up easily; he was much more used to the exercise, and saw that she was laughing too. They continued running and they didn't stop laughing for what it felt like forever, until one of them tripped (they would never agree on whom) and they tumbled to the ground heavily. She was still panting and grinning, and she could feel his chest moving with quiet laughter through the vibrations in the rough stone floor. She locked eyes with him and he gave her a strange look before chuckling lightly.

"- What?" – She huffed patting him on his ribcage side.

"- Well, wouldn't you consider this little escape of ours pointless, crazy and, hummm… how exactly did you put it…. bloody stupid?" – He said, his eyes twinkling with mischief and she let out a small giggle then gave him an enigmatic look.

"- It certainly was crazy and stupid, perhaps even foolish, but it wasn't, at all, pointless."

She stared at him, her eyes blazing and he felt like he had been hit by lightning. Slowly a smile spread across his face, because at that moment he knew that he was in; Lily Evans had at last let him in. And he would be damned if he were ever going to leave.


	8. Chapter 8

_A/N: Hello! I'm back! I know it took me a long time, but here it is, chapter 8! I hope you all like it! Thank you all for reviewing, it really makes my day! Shows me that you care ;) Anyway, this chapter was slightly influenced by recent problems in my personal life (even if there isn't a powerhungry mentally ill wizard after me, there are somethings I decided to incorporate), but the plot was kept untouched. Also, I love this U2 song, and I felt it fits the story to a T. So please read and tell me what you think! Special thanks for Pippapear, AnAspiringAuthor, Searchingforstories, Shetladance and TheShatteredBeloved for their lovely revies last chapter and as always to Lunar Sphynx my awesome Beta! PA_

**Chapter 8 – Sunday, Bloody Sunday **

She woke up with a smile on her face. It had become a recurrent occurrence. She wasn't exactly a morning person, but all of the sudden the prospects of a new day and all of its possibilities were awfully enticing. Her days now had a lot more laughter and a lot less yelling, and she quite liked it that way. Somehow in the space of three days the two of them had managed to strike something that resembled a friendship, and unexpectedly, albeit only for her, she had gotten a deal package. Four for the price of one; it was the Marauder way. That was one thing she would never complain about.

She smiled while putting her hair up in a neat ponytail, all along humming a soft tune. She liked singing; she had a good voice, not great, but sweet and pretty - just enough for her shower singing ambitions - very few people knew that about her. She looked at the image reflected in the large mirror. Red hair, green eyes and light freckles were all she could see. She never thought herself beautiful (although she was); in her opinion she was cute at best. She took a step closer and examined her reflection. It was strange to see herself so up close. She knew she had her father's eyes and hair, but that anyone that knew her family could tell you in a heartbeat. She noticed now though that her features had outgrown the childish roundness and she now held a striking resemblance to her mother's classic profile. She was thin and she always thought she was a tad too tall. Her chest wasn't what she would wish for but she felt her long legs somewhat compensated for it.

Taking a step back she did a small turn and stopped staring at the large mirror again, the smile never leaving her face. She never understood why he was so obsessed with her; he could have much prettier girls. She specifically remembered Tanya Morton, a beautiful olive-skinned brunette with startling yellowish eyes one year their senior that was publicly head over hills in love with him. Her smile broadened: somewhere deep down she had always enjoyed him running after her; it gave her some kind of validation to have James Potter want her, even if she would deny it to her own reflection. To be the object of his desire was, to say the least, confidence boosting, since each and every girl in school dreamed of having a Marauder, him and Sirius especially, so much as look their way.

She returned to her room and sat on her bed edge to put on her old sneakers, her mind wandering to the boy who was now the most constant topic of her divagations. After their little "prison break", like he called it, he had walked her back to her tower and they had talked for what it seemed like minutes but had been in fact hours. She could still hear his husky voice saying in that ever teasing manner of his _"Well, well, Lily Evans, not so hard to catch after all… Tsk, tsk. I expected more from you."_ And she could picture his slight grin perfectly in her mind's eye. And when they got to the entrance to her dorm she didn't want to go in, to leave him, and again he surprised her (he seemed to do that a lot) by plopping himself down on the ground.

"So, Miss Evans, how's it like, being Head Girl?" – He asked in a newscaster's mock tone as she stared at him in a startled way.

"What on earth are you doing?" – She had asked baffled.

"Don't really feel like walking all the way back now, so I thought, if you'll indulge me, we could continue our chat." – He shrugged nonchalantly, but at the same time gave her a pleading look. "So… Head Girl?"

"Tougher than I thought." – She had replied sitting down in front of him. She didn't realize just then, but she had just succumbed to the infamous Potter Charm.

And they had stayed there for a long time; the longest conversation she ever had with anyone, except for Alice, about anything and everything. It was just so strange that they could sit there and feel so normal, but the strangest thing was how much he seemed to get her; it was just so easy talking to him, like nothing was taboo and sarcasm was a second language. She now gave a full-fledged smile: he was just as quick as she was, and that was an accomplishment in itself. It had been some sort of a surreal night; having him all to herself, knowing bits of him a little better and allowing him to get to know her more at the same time. She found he was just as hard to read as she had thought; his answers and demeanor somehow managed to get her comfortable, startled and curious all at once. No one had ever had that effect on her and she had the slight suspicion no one else ever would.

She hopped the steps towards Great Hall, the shoelaces on her navy blue All-Stars now firmly tied. She continued humming one of her favorite songs from the Ramones, one her sister absolutely loathed like she did with most things Lily liked. She sighed, running her hand against the cold metal of the banister. These last few days had completely changed her life around. She could still see the shocked face of Mary's when Sirius came over at Divination and sat by them. They quickly found out everything was more fun with Sirius Black around, even (if not particularly) Divination. And pretty soon she had come to find out that nearly everything was much more fun with a Marauder around; apparently now they were on friendly terms with them and that had caused her friends to go absolutely ecstatic. If before she thought those four boys were just crazy, now she was positive they were absolutely mental, but that only added to their charm, because, boy, were they fun.

She knew Remus was sarcastic, but now she knew exactly how much. She found out that Peter was much like a Monty Python one man show and Sirius, well Sirius was an entertainer. He, much like his best mate, could laugh at himself easily and was just too likeable for his own good. And James, he was the hardest one. He was smart, truly smart, and witty, and he just had a way about him that it seemed he had a special aura, a magnetic quality that drew people in. He made things look simple even when they weren't. He liked the struggle; he liked challenges. She sighed. Maybe she wouldn't be able to figure him out so fast.

She approached the Gryffindor table, her mind still elsewhere. She scanned the room looking for her friends and found them quickly. But her eyes fell upon something much more interesting. He was sitting three sits down from Mary, in the Marauders usual spot. He and his friends were talking in a hushed manner and he had that look. And that grin. Sirius and Remus were smirking and nodding, sometimes they would interfere and the four of them would chuckle, and Peter, well Peter just looked in awe; and she knew at once what they were doing. It was a prank in development.

She sat by her friends and wished everyone a good morning. Alice stared at her in shock for her inability to talk before she had coffee was well known. She just shrugged and pulled the coffee jug closer. She glanced at his direction and couldn't look away for at that precise moment something happened: he was laughing. That same laugh she had heard when he had been alone in the Astronomy Tower, and she felt like she had just been washed over by a huge wave of easiness and confidence, happiness even. She smiled widely, pouring her coffee but her eyes never left him. She was staring and multitasking wasn't really one of her talents, so pretty soon there was a puddle of steaming liquid in front of her. Mary shook her and she let out a small scream because of the approaching hot fluid when it vanished. She looked up and was met by a pair of amused (too amused if you asked her) hazel eyes.

"Careful, Evans." – Came his husky voice. "That stuff will kill ya, you know?"

"No kidding, sunshine." – She retorted giving him a dirty look and expecting the beginning of one of their little banters. But he laughed again and again she was completely thrown off by it.

How could it be that she had spent over six years with him and had been completely oblivious to that sound she didn't know. All she knew was that now it affected her way too much. It was one of those sounds that stirred something in you, like when someone dragged their nails across a blackboard or when you couldn't close the bathroom sink's handle properly and the incessant dripping just bored holes in your sanity. But James' laugh was something else entirely. God, that laugh. It made her mood feel lighter; the small hairs on the back of her neck rising up slightly and the muscles on her shoulders relaxed a little. Therapy in a sound. She knew she was already hooked in him, but now apparently, she was further down then addicted. She was pathetic. She scoffed at her own stupid behavior and piled some waffles in front of her hoping no one had noticed her strange disposition.

And then the owls swooped in and Lily could feel herself biting her lip with a little too much force. Normally it wouldn't have been so terrifying, but at that precise time it was nothing short of dreadful. The Great Hall was swamped with owls holding black envelopes, the ones that could make you cry before even reading their contents. If one of those envelopes were for you, it meant that your life had already changed, that a piece of it was forever touched by horror. It meant Voldemort could touch you. She felt tears come to her eyes and held in her breath. The group of seventh year Gryffindor students watched with apprehension the flying birds. There was just too much black.

x -- x -- x -- x -- x -- x

He got up early and went running. He liked the early morning smell and the way everything was quiet and undisturbed. He loved the feeling of his feet pushing off the soft ground, the imprints of his passage clear. He liked how the freshness of the air filled his lungs and how right then he didn't need to think about anything else, worry about anything. It was just physical: one foot after the other and calculated intakes of breath. He smiled looking at his wristwatch; he was half way done but it felt like he had just started. He passed a blossoming branch and squinted trying to identify what kind of tree it belonged to. He quickened his step, setting new goals for his workout. He never liked things that were too easy. He smiled when he remembered her running in front of him; her red hair flowing behind her like a soft fire curtain. He chuckled. Fire wasn't soft. That's what she did to him; she drove him absolutely crazy.

As he ran he thought about how much their relationship had changed and how it seemed to be at that turning point. He wasn't naïve when it came to girls, he knew how to play that game. But with her it was somehow different, with her everything had to be just right and one wrong move could get back at square one. And he was making progress, deliberate, slow progress. He had talked to his friends and now they hung out with her and her friends more often. It wasn't an in your face, there all the time sort of thing, it was more, "let's be friends but one step at a time" kind of deal. And so far everything was going great. He passed that same flowery branch again and smiled. He remembered talking to her for hours that day. It was a strange kind of wonderful to be in his shoes that day. They had shared and they had laughed and he thought she knew too that they were setting the ground for something else. He sprinted even faster now, and reentered the castle.

Once he got done showering, he left with his friends for breakfast. Sundays were always undisputedly fun, mainly because Sirius loved Sundays and he wanted everyone to love them too. It was do-nothing, laugh-hard, prank-your-mates and eat-like-there's-no-tomorrow official day for the Marauders and therefore life was always a little bit better on a Sunday. They left for the Great Hall in their usual chatter that included laughing at Sirius and making fun of Peter. He said hello to some of the portraits and Peeves hovered past them running after Filch's gruesome cat.

While they walked to their table, they said hello to some friends and winked at some of the more susceptible females: they always got a kick out of the faces they made. They sat down in their usual spots, saying hello to Alice and Mary, who were already there. He was a bit disappointed that she wasn't there yet. He slapped himself mentally. Could he be any more whipped? Stupid sodding idiot. He swore at himself. He refocused his attentions to his friends, and pretty soon he was listening to Sirius' recounting of his previous night encounter with a lovely, but slightly idiotic, Hufflepuff. As he downed another waffle trying hard to stifle a laugh over the ending of his friend's tale, he let his eyes search for her once more. Nada still. He sighed and concentrated on joining his friends on their usual Sunday chore: prank planning.

They were deep in their conniving activities when he sensed she was near. He lifted his eyes and saw her walking towards the table in a very distracted way. She was smiling and he felt his heart flutter. She wasn't wearing her uniform (another reason to love Sundays) but a fitted dark brown knit and jeans. And the navy snickers he knew so well. He smiled at the sight of them. He loved that she was the kind of girl that would choose comfort over looks, and that she just didn't seem to care about was in fashion or out. He knew she liked her uniform to be always pristine, but all in all, she was at ease in her own skin. He forced his eyes away from her and reentered the Marauders' world.

As they planned a particularly crazy, funny bit, James couldn't help but chuckle. Pretty soon the four of them were chuckling and the amount of stupidity and nonsense was so much he had to laugh out loud. That was the thing about having friends like his; life was never dull. But then he heard Mary shaking her and she let out a small scream as she saw the small, but rapidly moving, puddle of hot coffee she had made. He swished his wand and it was gone. He looked at her trying to hold in his laughter; it was so unlike her to scream like that. They locked eyes and he couldn't resist and teased her. She threw him a dirty look and gave him a childish reply causing him to let out the laugh he had been holding in. And then, as swiftly as the wind could change, everything went dark.

x -- x -- x -- x -- x -- x

It was eight o'clock in the evening and she was sitting in the Headmaster's office for the very first time in her life. While she waited for him, her eyes kept wondering over all the strange, sometimes even bizarre, things perched on the crowded shelves and walls. She wanted to touch them, shake them, maybe even open them, but of course she wouldn't. She knew exactly why she was there, and she wished she didn't know. She wished she didn't know that so many people had been hurt and many others killed. She wished she didn't know that crying had been the overpowering sound that replaced James' laughter that morning. She wished she knew what to say but she wished even harder that she wouldn't have to say anything. She wanted to wake up from the nightmare she was in. But she couldn't. She sat up straighter when she heard someone clear his throat in front of her.

Dumbledore was there. His usually twinkling blue eyes were now absolutely serious. She looked over the wizard in front of her. Some days, like when the Marauders threw an especially witty prank or when he was eating one of his favorite candies, it was hard to believe that long bearded man to be the most powerful wizard in Britain. But right now, as her eyes surveyed him, she had no doubt he was. Instead of sitting down on his chair, he rounded the cluttered desk and stood in front of him.

"Thank you for coming, Miss Evans" – The headmaster started. "Although I'm sure you know why I asked you to come here, there might be some things that come as a surprise to you."

Lily nodded slowly but her mind was racing. The door opened quietly and Professor McGonagall stepped in with her usual proud demeanor denouncing her weariness over the day's events. She greeted them stiffly and then moved to the opposite side of the round room.

"As I was saying before, Lily, today was a dark day for the wizarding world." – Dumbledore restarted. "And today's occurrences will undoubtedly take a heavy on all of us, some more than others tough. Did you manage to talk to Mr. Diggory today, Lily?"

"No, sir." – She said, comprehension and anxiety dawning on her.

"I'm afraid I am the bearer of bad news then." – The blue eyes behind the half moon spectacles were darker now. "Mr. Diggory's family has suffered a severe blow. His parents were submitted to ruthless torture, which led to his mother's death and his father's commitment to St. Mungo's. Amos has already left the school grounds to visit him and prepare other arrangements. It is a very sad day, indeed."

Lily was holding back her tears with great effort; she wasn't close to the Head Boy but they were friendly and she couldn't imagine what he was going through. She swallowed hard, lifting her head up to meet his once again.

"But I'm afraid this is not all, Lily dear." – Professor McGonagall interfered in a soft tone foreign to Lily's knowledge of the severe witch so far.

"Minerva is quite right." – The powerful wizard continued. "As he left the school grounds today, Mr. Diggory made known to us his desire to abdicate his position as Head Boy." – Dumbledore paused slightly, fidgeting with the ends of his beard. "He believes that even after his return to the school, which we're unsure of, he won't be able to meet his obligations with the necessary diligence."

"But I'll help him." – Lily pleaded even tough she knew it was futile. "I can take charge of things and take over until he's ready to come back."

"That's very sweet, dear, but I don't think Mr. Diggory is changing his mind." – McGonagall replied sternly.

"Which leads to the reason we've asked you here." – The Headmaster said a soft but serious tone. "We need to select a new Head Boy and, although we have some ideas of our own, we thought it would be in the school's best interest to hear yours."

"You want my ideas over whom should be the new Head Boy?" – She asked in disbelief, receiving in return a polite nod from the wizard in front of her.

Her mind spun so fast she didn't know where she was anymore. The scenes from the day's events replayed in her head. She remembered Marlene's face, another Gryffindor seventh year, when she read the envelope that said that her grandmother had been killed and that her brother had been gravely injured. Her younger brother. She remembered how people started crying and hurls of pain and grief took over the morning's meal that moments before had been filled with happiness. She remembered how friends turned to each other for support and how for a few minutes she was at a loss for actions and words. She remembered then, that just as she was standing up to try and help somehow, he was already there. He had already taken matters into his own hands and had commanded his friends and Quidditch comrades to split up and help out. She watched as he told Alice to help out Frank Longbottom, and Sirius to go sit by a sobbing third year while he piled chocolate chip cookies, muffins and brownies in a platter and walked towards Marlene, who was sitting still in shock with tears running down her face. She saw him motioning to Remus towards the Ravenclaw table where Dorcas Meadows was literally shivering. And suddenly she felt her mind clear.

"James Potter." – She said in a clear resolute tone looking at the two elders in front of her.

_A/N: Ha! Finally! Its been in the works for a while but now here it is: James is Head Boy! Bye, Amos (like Sphynx said, this guy can't catch a break!). Hehe. But I promise more surprises next chapter!_


	9. Chapter 9

_Hello everyone, I know, I know, I'm a bad, terrible evil person that can't update fast enough. But this time I must say it really wasn't my fault. I was almost done with this chapter when my laptop just went puff! No more HD for me. And its still not working. So now I had to retype everything on my mother's computer, which she only allows me to use once in a blue moon. Anyway, I hope you like it! Review if you please! PA_

**Chapter 9 – Riders on a Storm**

That morning was nothing short of a nightmare. He felt like he had been sucked into a hurricane's eye; a whirlwind of emotions had rushed through his skin as he prayed silently that one of those dark envelopes wouldn't have his name on it. Again. And as he held in the tears he began to feel everything at once, anger, tiredom, sadness. And something he swore he would never yield to: fear. And as he looked around he could tell it was the same for everyone else in that room. It was overwhelming; all those sounds of pain, but he had sworn to himself that he would do everything within his power to help stop _them_ from winning. He had sworn to never give in. And before even he himself knew what he was going to do, he was doing it. He gave instructions and distributed tasks, all done decidedly and surely. He didn't second guess himself or stop to think. He leaded. That was just who James was, a leader.

The entire afternoon was spent the same way; in mourning. Whether it was listening, sitting quietly with others or simply smiling sympathetically at them, he and his friends had made clear they could count on the Marauders if they needed them. In time, he and his friends had become somewhat of a school institution and it gave them the last thing they would ever have expected: responsibility. So now there they were, huddled together plus two going over the details of their newest plan, just this time it didn't involve pranks or jokes. It was bigger than that.

They felt satisfied with the scheme they came up and decided it was good enough to be set into motion and each part began executing their tasks and that was why he was walking towards that spiraled staircase. This time they needed backup, and they needed it to be official. He reached the all too familiar gargoyle and said the first candy name he could think of and immediately stairs appeared. He climbed up easily but deep in thought, his mind resting far away with his friends and just as his knuckles were about to touch the door in front of him, it opened softly and he was met by his Transfiguration teacher's stern look.

"Come in, Mr. Potter."- She said tiredly. "We've been expecting you."

- x - x - x - x - x -

It was unsettling sometimes how omniscient he could be. As she said his name she was quite sure it would cause shock and awe, since their previous relationship hadn't been exactly stellar. But as the words "James Potter" came out of her mouth the headmaster gave her that familiar smile, the one that said subtly that that was what he expected all along. Sometimes she had a feeling nothing inside the school walls escaped him, not even a school girl crush. It was very unnerving. Very.

"Well, Miss Evans, I believe Mr. Potter will be pleasantly surprised." - Albus Dumbledore said and for the first time that day she recognized a happy twinkle in his blue eyes. "But we'll know soon enough. Minerva, would you please be so kind as to let him in?"

Once again she stared at the headmaster in shock as the professor opened the door silently. For a moment she doubted Dumbledore and thought it was a practical joke. She said his name and he was there: ta-da! What a trick! But then her eyes traveled to opened door and she met his gaze. Those eyes. Dear Lord, those golden hazel eyes. She wanted to smile and look away but in truth she was hypnotized and she couldn't take her eyes away from him. He wasn't wearing his robes anymore, just his white shirt, black slacks and tie. His sleeves were rolled up and his hair was mussed up as always and she wondered if he had always been that appealing. And when he smiled and sat beside her, her breath caught on her throat for unexplainable reasons and she suddenly wondered if picking him to work with had been the smartest choice. She held in a sigh when the headmaster started talking once again and tried to pretend she was indeed paying attention. Because she knew that her attention now just wouldn't settle on the old wizard.

- x - x - x - x - x -

As he entered the rounded room, he shot his transfiguration teacher an inquiring look, but he wasn't surprised. He knew it took a lot to actually get something past their all-knowing headmaster. But when his eyes fell on the redhead sitting to his left he felt his heart beat just a little bit faster. He hadn't seen her all day. As Head Girl she had been helping organize the return home of some students, instructing prefects and basically running around the school trying to do a million things at once. And he loved her for it. He was proud of her for stepping up to the plate when she was needed, and even more so for doing it with kindness and grace. He smiled at her and took the seat the headmaster had motioned for him.

"Mr. Potter, we were just discussing some matters concerning you." - The Headmaster said and James lifted a surprised eyebrow. "But I do believe you have something you need to address as well, since it's a very rare occurrence to have you here at your own accord." - To this comment James tried to hide a smirk, as did everyone else in the room.

"Too true, sir." - James said in an amused tone of voice, making Lily wonder how he could be so at ease at a time like this. "I just came because we, I mean me and some other Gryffindor students, feel that we should do something concerning the events of this morning." - He paused and Lily noticed that McGonagall had a proud look on her face. "I think it's important we stand together and the others agree. Since tomorrow lots of people will go home or attend some of the services we devised a plan and we feel it would be best to set it in motion tonight." - James spoke with confidence and the redhead beside him couldn't help but smile and admire his easy confidence.

"I think it is a marvelous idea, James." - Dumbledore replied with a smile. "And before you can explain to us the exact details of your plan, I think we should talk about another pressing matter." - The old wizard paused gravely and received a nod from the hazel-eyed boy in agreement. "As you know, Amos had to leave, and at the time of his departure he chose to abdicate his Head Boy position." - The man's blue eyes were now staring sharply at the young wizard. "I know we have talked about this before, but I must say this time I am hoping for a different outcome."

"But Albus, what about...?" - James replied in a hushed tone and the Head Girl was absolutely stunned at the exchange that had just passed.

"I know James, but I think you are needed here more at the moment. And I'm sure Moody would agree," - Dumbledore paused and gave the other a meaningful look. "So, Mr. Potter, we, me, the Headmistress and the Head Girl, would like to offer you the Head Boy position. Do you accept it?"

James felt his breath caught in his throat. Since his father's death he had looked for a way to join the fight against Voldemort and finally at the end of last term he had found it. The Order of Phoenix. He and Sirius had sustained the murderous training Alastor Moody had designed for new recruits and he was eager to fight. So when previously Dumbledore had asked him if he would like to be Head Boy, he had talked to Moody and decided that he rather be available for missions. But now he was torn. He could feel the mood inside the school walls tumbling and as a Gryffindor it broke his heart. He loved that school, it was his home away from home. He looked at the beautiful girl beside him: she was looking back at him with expectant eyes. He felt himself smile slowly and she smiled back at him.

"Of course, sir." - He replied in a way that sounded as if there had never been any doubts whatsoever over his acceptance. "I'd be honoured."

"Excellent." - the Headmaster replied. "Then I believe it is important we discuss some things concerning your new position." - He paused and looked at the two women in the room. "I'll make sure Mr. Potter finds you when we're finished here."

Quickly Minerva McGonagall and Lily left the room leaving the two men to talk about James' new position and its responsibilities and duties.

- x - x - x - x - x -

Lily walked down the corridor absorbed in her thoughts. She felt stupid for not being able to restrain her thoughts from him when there was so much going on that needed her attention but she couldn't help it. James was Head Boy now. They would be working together, planning together, practically living together. And still he was riddle she couldn't crack. From Dumbledore's words she had gathered that he had been asked to be Head Boy before but hadn't accepted and that was absolutely puzzling. On top of that he had addressed the Headmaster with a level of familiarity that was just unexpected. And what did Moody, the Head Auror, have to do with anything? Her head was spinning.

She wanted to ask a million questions, she wanted to grill him and know the answers she was sure she wouldn't get. Sometimes she felt he had an entire life she didn't know anything about. And she wanted to. She wanted to know everything about him, what made his lovely hazel eyes sparkle and what made his blood boil. She was a curious person, it was in her nature, but this was more than just curiosity. She wanted to know, but more than anything, she wanted him to tell her.

- x - x - x - x - x -

As he looked at the powerful man's face he wondered why he had chosen him. He wondered why from the hundreds of boys inside the castle walls it had to be him. He wasn't sure he wanted that kind of responsibility. He had never even really considered it. He was a Marauder. And now he was a fighter. He didn't care about balls, prefects and decorations. But he wasn't stupid and he knew that this year there was more to it. He could see people turning to Lily and Diggory for support, but in the end one of them couldn't provide it. The hufflepuff boy had been broken himself. And now he was sitting there, listening to rules and duties, hoping that the man in front of him was right. That the best choice was the one he had just made.

"James, I believe you made the right choice." - Dumbledore said as if reading his thoughts and he instantly smiled for he knew that might have been exactly the case. "Hogwarts needs leaders now. And that you are."

"Thank you, sir." - He replied honestly.

"You can call me Albus, James. And also, on a personal note, I think you will form a brilliant team with Miss Evans." - He paused when he saw the Head Boy's lips twitch upwards. "One for the records, I'm sure."

"I've been saying that for years." - He replied with a smile and stood up. He heard the headmaster chuckle before he could open the door to leave.

- x - x - x - x - x -

When she entered Gryffindor tower she was surprised to find a buzz of busy people, no longer the quiet sad mood she had seen before. She saw Sirius talking to some of the members of the quidditch team in the corner, his hands gesturing forcefully, and found Alice to be instructing some first years with Remus on the opposite side. She walked towards her best friend taking in the movement and trying to figure out what was going on. But then it hit her. James' plan. That was it. She reached the brunette's side and smiled as she heard her telling the young students to meet them at the precise time and that they would be paired with an older student to participate. She stood there quietly, understanding the beautiful plan her friends and he and his friends had come up with. It was perfect and she would never ever have come up with something so perfect. It took a degree of daringness and a creative mind to come up with something like that and again she wanted to pick through his brain.

When he entered the room maybe a half hour later she knew he was there before she even turned around. People stopped talking the minute the portrait hole opened and looked expectantly at the door. He paused gravely but then smiled widely and shouted "It's on people!". Cheers erupted and she was dazzled. The students mood had been completely altered. It was the most stunning feeling. People were still saddened but now they also felt empowered; like they were part of something bigger. Like they were doing their part.

She watched as he crossed the room to join his best friend. The impressively goodlooking mates talking quickly almost without needing words. She bit her lip when she saw him approach Marlene. The blonde girl looked at him with adoring eyes and he gave her a kind hug. She turned from the scene and began learning the spell Remus had pointed out to her. Was that pain in her stomach jealousy? She had never felt that before. She shook her head lightly repeating the words from the notes in front of her absently. Be strong, she repeated inside her head. Be strong. You are Lily Evans.

- x - x - x - x - x -

With each step he took he said a little prayer inside his head. He hoped everything would go ok. He knew that at times like this people needed hope and that was exactly why they were doing it. Because hope is something much more reachable if you're not alone. Hope, as happiness, grows stronger when shared with others. And he wanted the school to hope. He wanted these people not to surrender to fear and terror. So he walked decidedly, each step he took resounding strongly through the stone beneath him, trying to convey to them some security. But inside his head he was praying. Just like everybody else.

He could see Remus and Peter talking quietly through the corner of his eye, the first one reassuring the second he would do alright. He didn't need to look, he knew Sirius was walking quietly beside him, in much the same way he was doing. And he knew she was right behind him. Walking in her poised manner. He could feel her radiant smile: its warmth enveloping him and giving him all the reassurance he needed. He reached the large oak doors and saw that the school staff was already outside waiting for them. He leaded them towards the pitch and sat down, waiting for the other houses to join them. Soon enough the quidditch pitch was filled with people from every house and Professor McGonagall nodded for him to stand up. He picked himself up slowly, and walked up to the front of the hundreds of students. He looked for her mesmerizing green eyes and silently told her to join him where he stood. As she reached his side in that calm stride, she smiled at him, the same smile he knew was there but hadn't been able to see before.

The headmistress made a small movement with her wand beside him and a wave of silence engulfed them all. The Head Girl looked at him and gave him a shy grin that meant "go on". He took one step foward and breathed in deeply. Here goes nothing.

"Today started with dread. With sadness. And fear." - James started in a loud tone, his husky voice carrying through the silence. "And we know it's normal and it's what's expected after what happened. But just because it started this way, doesn't mean it has to end the same way. If we stand together we can change things. Standing together here tonight we can cry on each other's shoulder and be sure someone else is there to catch us. No one inside this castle is alone. No one inside this castle has to surrender to fear. We are all here together and while we are together we can all hope. Let's make this night not about death, but about a celebration of those we loved. Let's make this night about beauty and hope." - He finished as people stared at him with admiration. He lifted his arm and said "up" and his broom zoomed into his grip.

All around people got to their feet and paired up, each pair holding a broom. When everyone was ready and set they looked at the man in the centre, beside him stood a third year boy with short curly hair. They looked at him waiting for the final word but it didn't come from his mouth, but from the redheaded girl beside him.

"To hope." - Lily's sing-song voice vibrated through the night air as her companion's feet pushed their broom off the ground.

"To hope." - Repeated many voices copying them and flying towards sky.

They were all high now, the soft breeze blowing whilst they reached the agreed formation. And then it was time. The teachers and older students reached out their hands and with an intricate movement said its matching enchantment. They watched in amazement as the flashes of light combined themselves into one silvery cloud high up. And soon enough the rain came down. It was warm, golden rain, beautiful and yet simple. It embraced everyone in a heavenly cry for those that had departed. And than he flew in right in the middle of them all; he plunged his broom in vertical dive and did a pirouette which caused his young partner to let out a cry of delight. And it was Sirius turn and then Alice's. And pretty soon, people were flying like there was no tomorrow. They let the warm storm wash away the feelings of sorrow and hugged, cried and laughed together. People swapped partners and managed to tell each other just how much they meant to them. It was a suiting homage.

And as he soared through the air with his cloathes soaked and his hair staying flatly against his head for the first time in his life, he couldn't help but smile. This time they won.


	10. Chapter 10

**Hello everybody! I know its been like forever and ever and maybe some more and I apologise, but really, it was impossible for me to write these last few months. But now I'm back and I'll try to be a bit more constant from now on, I promise. Well, if you all haven't totally lost interest yet please, please review and let me what you think! Love, PA**

**Chapter 10 – Unhealthy behaviors**

She is staring and she knows it, but for some reason she just can't seem to turn it off. It's been like this for the last couple days. It's slowly driving her insane and she's pretty sure that in the near future her poor mind is going to break and she won't be able to stop it. Her destiny is St. Mungos and she knows it. And its all because he's sitting there, his eyes focused in a board as he chooses the best move for his bishop. She's doing her very best to tear her eyes from his well-crafted face and continue working on her essay (which happens to be due to the next day, mind you) but well, it seems her nervous system has got some sort of communication failure for her mental commands are not reaching her eyes. Not by a mile. He smiles when his knight snatches Remus' queen and she can't help the breath that catches on her throat. She feels someone poke her arm and is finally startled out of her trance to find Mary looking at her questiongly. She tries to act as if she was thinking about their essay and she can't believe she pulled it off. Thank God it wasn't Alice. She wouldn't be able to pull that one off with Alice.

She continues writing the same page she had been working on for the last twenty minutes and feels a little aggravated about her unusual slowness. Damn him. And damn her stupid hormones. She knows why she's been staring even more these last few days and she can't help but feel stupid and frustrated. It's such a clichéd way to act. And she hates being a cliché. But she can't help it. She can't help picturing his damp hair and his chiseled stomach and his tanned muscles and it feels infuriating. She can't help thinking fate has it out for her because now she can't find her concentration anywhere. Why did it have to happen to her? She was on her way to breakfast early when she remembered she had forgotten her new quill and decided to rush back and get it. Just as he was leaving the bathroom. In a towel. A bloody towel! She had, of course, been rendered speechless. At first he was startled, he obviously thought she had already left (which she had) but when she stood there staring he had smirked. So she tried to fix it and, Lord what a disaster that'd been, she spluttered words around until finally something resembling sorry came out. And then he shook his head and laughed, wet drops landing on her hands and pristine uniform, making her shiver slightly.

"It's alright." - He said, his eyes laughing along with his twitching lips. "Honestly, Evans, your face is almost the color of your hair...."

And he disappeared inside his room. Still grinning. The sodding hot idiot. And she stood there. Merlin she had been floored. And she hated it (but she loved it too, if she were honest). And now she couldn't function if he was in her near vicinity. Hell, sometimes she couldn't function when he wasn't anywhere near her. And in about twenty minutes they had patrols together. She hated fate and hormones. She sighed. "Merlin, am I dead."

x – x – x – x – x -

He was contemplating his next move. He could either take Remus' pawn with his bishop and hope he would open up his queen or make a safer move with one of his own pawns. Risky choice it is, he decided. He could feel her eyes on him. She had been like that for a couple days now. Ever since she had ran into him leaving the shower in the Heads' Dorm. He couldn't help but smile at the irony of it all. She had blushed to an impossible level and had stuttered. Lily Evans had blushed and stuttered because of him. That had been priceless, one of the top moments of his life for certain. Check. He glanced backwards discreetly to see her talking to Mary. But she still had that look, the coy and airy one that meant she was covering for something while trying to act smooth. Merlin, he knew all of her looks, or at least most of them. He was pretty damn near positive it wasn't healthy for him to know so much when they had been friends for so little time, but he couldn't help it -he had been watching her for the longest time.

It had been a tiresome week for him, having to deal with Quidditch, Order training and now Head duties. But the thing that was taking most of him was living with her. Working with her? Fine, he could handle that. He had figured out a system that allowed him not to be an utter fool when working around her: focus on the task and act normal. Forget she's the girl of your dreams and talk business. But living with her? Merlin, he was not ready for that (and he was glad that day with the towel to find she wasn't quite ready either). Like the other day when he found her babydoll forgotten in the bathroom sink. It was a deep burgundy, silky and lacy and the visuals that flooded his head at the thought of her in it, he felt guilty to even remember it. He had, obviously, taken a long cold shower that day. But despite all those things he still missed her. They were always busy and running around and when they weren't he was a little afraid of pushing her and so they hadn't been spending anytime together. Alone together.

He was a mostly excited and a little nervous, and he was barely ever nervous. They had their first patrol together today. A couple hours alone with her roaming the dark loomy corridors of the school and he wasn't sure he could take it. Especially not with the staring. It was funny that now the roles had been reversed. She was staring and he was pretending not to notice. He knew how it worked with boys -they were all dying to see someone naked (or even half-naked). But he would never have guessed the effects a little flesh would have on her. And he wondered if she would have acted the same whether it was anybody or if, maybe, it could be only him. And, Merlin, he hoped for the second. He only had fifteen minutes until rounds now. Time seemed to be running by these last few days, he thought.

x – x – x – x – x -

Her essay was still one page long. Talk about frustrating. And he was sitting there playing chess absolutely undisturbed. It wasn't fair. At all. What a time to decide to turn into a teenaged girl. She looked at the clock and noticed she still had ten minutes until leaving for rounds. God, time was passing excruciatingly slow these days, she heaved. She didn't realize but she was staring again. She watched the way he waited for his friend to make a move, his eyes intent and the light from the fire dancing in his glasses. His sleeves were rolled up and she could see the nice contours of his forearms. She noticed everything about him lately and she was pretty sure it wasn't very healthy. She saw him tease Sirius when he came down the boys' stairway -he looked casual but his hair was rather tame and it made it obvious he had "plans"- and she hope he couldn't tell she had put a little extra effort in her looks today. At first she tried to convince herself she was doing it for herself (a girl can want to look hot for herself, right?) and it had nothing to do with their upcoming rounds. Fat chance. Her hair was not in her usual ponytail but flowing freely on her shoulders, her skirt was just an inch higher and she was wearing very very faint make-up. She was confident he couldn't tell (but he could). She searches him for signs that he has done the same thing and the only thing she can come up with is that his hair is even messier today. Those raven strands used to drive her up the wall, she chuckles, because secretly she always wondered what it would be like to run her fingers through it, to make it even more chaotic, to reel in the feel of it. A hand is waving in front of her all the sudden and it takes a few seconds before she can realize Alice has joined them. Damn.

"You know, it's a miracle you haven't pushed him against a wall and snogged him senseless yet." Her cruel best friend states with a mock wonder tone. "Maybe you've been saving up for patrols, Lil?"

"One: it's not funny. And two: shut up or I will have to avada you." -She retorted glaring at her brunette friend who kept on smiling. "I don't want to, but you know I'll do it."

"Oh, pish-posh." - Alice said dropping herself beside her with haughty grin. "We both know you love me too much."

"Sometimes extreme measures are necessary." She shrugged.

She looks back to where he had been sitting but he's no longer there. Only five more minutes and she's lost him. She wonders what she would do if he didn't come back. Can she yell at him like she used to, would they go back to when they didn't know how to talk to each other unless it were a shouting match? She isn't sure she can go back. She knows too much about him, and he understands her too well. A hand touches her shoulder lightly but warmth spreads quickly from that point and she knows its him.

"Hey. Ready?" - He asks with that voice of his, just as he takes his hand away from her and she wishes he had let it there a little longer.

"Yeah." - And though it's not much it's the best answer she's got. Because he's standing there (too close) and she can smell his shampoo and there's only so much a girl can take.

x – x – x – x – x -

They walk out the portrait hole and he can tell, even without looking at her, that she is doing her best not to look his way and he can't help the smirk that gains his lips. He decides its too much fun to watch her squirm and instead of starting conversation as he had planned he lets the tension grow between them as they walk in silence for a few minutes. After a while he can feel her eyes on him reluctantly, as though she was forced to look by a power mightier than her own, a feeling he knows all too well. He loves that this thing is now backwards (or at least appears to be so) and decides to take pity on her. Well, kind of.

"You should really stop picturing me undressed, Evans..." He said lazily in a sarcastic tone and she nearly jumps out of her own skin at his comment. "It really takes away from patrolling, you know."

"Like I... I mean...." She stammered. "Oh, shut up, Potter. I was not picturing you starkers..."

"Yeah, whatever.... If I pretend I believe you, will you stop doing it?" He asked this time pretending to be annoyed while he puts a tapestry back in place, but in truth fighting back the urge to smile.

"Deal." She agreed but when he smiled she realised she had just admitted to be doing what he said. "I mean...."

She nudged in the ribs with her arm, hitting him with no force at all. He looked at her, his face dead serious for a few moments but then he broke: he laughed at her. But it was just that kind of laugh, the one that renders her helpless, the one she loved most so she can't really help when she laughs along.

"You know, you're easier to trick then I thought." He said playfully.

"Well, you're just as insufferable as I thought." She retorted right back.

"Maybe so, but at least now I won't have to walk in silence for hours on end..." He shrugged and a smile crept her lips.

"Prat."

"Perv."

"I'm not a perv!"

"Well, you just admitted you were picturing me starkers..."

"I did not! You tricked me."

"Still."

"Prat."

And they laughed again. It was just so easy being with her. It was everything he had always hoped for. He loved her witty humor and her ready temper. And he loved her shy demeanor. And he had just now found out that he loved her eyes when she laughed. The green orbs seemed to create miniature tornados within them and reflect tiny crystals. It was breathtaking and alluring to say the least.

"So, what did you think of your first week as Head?" She asked casually changing topics.

"I think I will be lucky if I live the entire term." He answered his eyes widening slightly. She chuckled.

"Come on, it's not that bad..." She said checking out inside a classroom.

"Yeah, I know, it's just, I wasn't counting on it." He shrugged.

"So, you'd really turned it down before?" She asked hoping she sounded nonchalant when in fact she was filled with curiosity.

"How'd you know?" He turned to face her, one eyebrow raised.

"In the meeting... Dumbledore said "this time"." Lily replied watching him intently.

"Oh, that." James answered dejected. "Yes, I did turn it down before."

"Why?" She didn't mean to sound so eager but her voice betrayed her.

"I just have a lot on my plate right now." He shrugged evasively.

As they walked and talked, laughing and joking, he couldn't help but let himself loosen up with her. It was just too easy, too tempting. He loved every minute they spent together and it made him regret even more what he couldn't tell her. Because he could sense her curiosity and it made him a little unnerved; knowing that somethings he wouldn't be able to tell her. But he pushed those thoughts aside while they walked and she told him a tale about a fourth year she had caught sneaking around on her first year as a prefect. Her little nose wrinkled as she put emphasis on a disgusting part of her story and he felt his heart swallow in his chest. Despite everything he couldn't deny this Head Boy business had some perks. Great perks. Unbeatable perks even.

x – x – x – x – x -

She dropped her shoes on the floor next to her bed and discarded her socks in the same distracted manner. She was smiling while she searched her trunk for her pajamas and without even thinking about she twirled in place. Realization hit her immediately after her childish behavior and she banged her head lightly against the wall. Before today she could pretend that he was just another boy. That the thing about him was just that he was attractive (oh, sweet Merlin, was he ever) and that her feelings were just her hormones going haywire. But now, now the pretending was done with. She had twirled. Twirled! Oh, for Christ's sake. She stared and she twirled: both completely un-Lily-like behaviors. The boy was driving her bloody bonkers. And the worst part was that he wasn't even trying (or at least she didn't think so).

They had been so synchronized today. Even when he had made fun of her she felt strangely elated, even though it had been widely disconcerting having him mock her openly. And she was still unnerved by his mind-reading abilities. Because she had so been picturing those phenomenal abs of his. But still, in their two hours together time had flown by, like patrolling was actually fun. And she knew that patrols were definitely not fun so it just had to be the, well, company. And the company's hazel eyes, tanned forearms and soft-looking hair. She hit her head against the wall a little more forcefully this time. Merlin, what was going on! She remembered that time when she had found him alone in the Astronomy Tower. It had been then that her eyes had begun to follow him more closely. And tonight, as they walked the same halls together, she couldn't help but feel, well, privileged to be allowed this proximity. And she reveled in it, oh how she did. His eyes were just ever teasing and his smile was always there for her. And the image of his lips, those soft-looking, perfectly plump, dimple-adorned lips were haunting her. And she found herself staring even more and her hands clammed up because she closed them tightly to prevent them from reaching up and touching him, because, quite honestly, the urge to do so was almost unbearable. She hit the wall again.

"Merlin, I fancy him."


	11. Chapter 11

_Hey Everyone! Here we go! Its short but sweet... coming soon more action full chapters! Yey! Please, please review: I love reading what you think :) _PA

**Chapter Eleven – Slow Burn**

The water hit his shoulder and he immediately felt his muscles ease. It was strange how something he found so relaxing was also so exhausting, but that was Quidditch alright. He let his head sag a little while the cold shower washed over him, it was, as always, a feeling he relished in. The cold drops soothed his aching limbs as if caressing each part of him, the nape of his neck, the bruise on his ribcage, his overworked legs, and he prolonged the minutes under the blessed downpour. Slowly he closed the handle and reached for his towel in a mechanic movement. Enough time wasted; he had to get going.

He carelessly grabbed the first pair of clean clothes out of his sports bag, an old pair of track shorts (so worn off that the color was undefinable) and a black long sleeved hooded t-shirt that he didn't think was his, and put them on without second thought. He flashed a look at the mirror while attempting (fruitlessly) to tame his hair. He threw his used clothes in the bag's other side and put on his trusty trainers. He called out some cheers to his friends and started walking towards the Heads' Dorm distractedly. He loved being outside, he loved that feeling of the wind sweeping through him and he wished he could enjoy it more often. He remembered when he was eight and his mum used to tell him an ancient Spanish myth about the Santa Ana's warm wind, how strange and impossible things happened whenever that warm wind blew. He smiled and made a mental note to write to his mother later. He had been skivvying off his duties as a son lately, since he seemed to have acquired quite a few other duties.

They had agreed to meet today and go over the plans for Halloween next week and she had volunteered her Saturday night. Just like that. At first he didn't think too much of it, but later he couldn't help but feel a little jittery. It was just that two years ago he would never believe possible for her to voluntarily spend time with him, much less on a Saturday night. But then again, they were both very different people from two years ago. He smiled when he thought about how his mother had told him of how when she had first met his father she had sworn to hate him for all eternity, but later when Charles had grown up she couldn't help but fall for him. His smile grew even wider: could history repeat itself? For Godric and everything sacred he hoped so. He was almost there when he bumped into some fifth year girls (the ones who giggled the most) and pretended not to notice the extensive ogling that ensued. Suddenly feeling a little self-conscious, he looked closer at his clothes and wished that he had payed more attention earlier: it was not everyday he got to spend at least a good hour alone with her. But now that ship has sailed, he thought, and he pronounced the password to their shared dorm.

_**X - X - X - X - X – X**_

She was sitting in the common room alone; she already had the fire cracking, the books ready and she had even gone so far as to get them some treats in case he got hungry (he had been at the Quidditch pitch all that time). She was distractedly making everything perfect so they could work better (or so she told herself) when a soft hooting sound caught her attention. Her owl, Elvis, was standing there. He was a rather dark owl, an almost black shade of grey, with a proud stance. She went closer and patted him softly whilst stripping his leg of the letter it carried. He hooted happily again and nuzzled against her hand quickly before darting out the window.

A smile played her lips while she closed the tall window and went to read next to fire. She still had at least ten minutes before James arrived. She looked at the white envelope: she hoped it was her father's. She had just written him a lengthy letter the day before and hoped he had already replied. She quickly found out she was to be disappointed, for her mothers neat scrawl was on the outside of the envelope. She sighed and, sitting down, tore the paper open and began reading. It had not been five sentences and her blood was already boiling. She felt tears form in her eyes but she refused to cry over _her_. If she wanted to act like that, then it was just _fine_. If she wanted to marry that bloody walrus and listen about bleeding oil drills for the rest of her bloody life while continuously ignoring her sister, then it was _perfectly fine_ with Lily. She took a few calming breaths and continued reading. _"Lily, dear, we're all excited that your sister's wedding is in just a couple weeks! Daddy and I are also incredibly happy that we'll get to have you at home even if only for a couple days."_ She read. It was all such bollocks. Ok, maybe not all, but she knew for a fact that her parents didn't like Vernon the walrus anymore than she did. She sighed and in a fit of anger, ripped a small piece of the paper and threw it in the fire. She watched happily while it burned; getting some strange kind of satisfaction from it, she decided to rip another little piece. This time she floated it into the fire and watched marveled when it turned to ashes. _"How's that for spiteful behavior, Pet?"_.

She heard the portrait move slowly and heard his cheerful whistling. He was always cheerful after flying, she had noticed. His eyes had that irresistible golden tone, his skin had that perfect glow and his messy locks were indisputably wild: it was impossible not to look. In fact, it was damn near impossible not to stare. He walked in with a happy spring in his step and she couldn't help the smile that took her lips despite her foul mood. She remembered once having asked Remus how he could make Alice smile when it seemed no one else could, and his friend only replied _"You'd have to know him. I think you'd really like him if you did."_ She felt a faint blush spread on her cheeks –oh, how right had he been. She saw him pause when he noticed her sitting on the couch and her favorite crooked grin spread on his lips making her heart do a strange dance. She hoped he didn't notice. His eyes rested on the miniature balls of paper her hands had been forming inadvertently and he raised an inquisitive brow.

"Something the matter?" -His velvet voice asked while he sat himself on the other corner of the same sofa she was in. The delicious smell from his freshly showered form hit her unexpectedly.

"Just family stuff." -Her thoughts were momentarily strained to get back to her shortening letter, and her voice came out involuntarily bitter.

"Oh... some sibling rivalry?" -He returned, trying to make it light, but his eyes were serious.

"Something like that..." -She let herself trail off, releasing a sigh. "_She_ is getting married, the wedding is in two weeks." She exhaled sharply.

"I see." - His eyes flickered to the crumpled paper and a small smirk appeared. "Maybe I could help, then? There _is_ a reason I'm on the team."

She smiled, he grabbed one tiny ball and threw it exactly in the middle of the fire with a flourish.

"Score!" -He fake cheered himself and she felt herself smile even wider.

"Nice one, Potter." -She praised in an impression of one of his many team peers.

"Wow, a compliment!" -He mocked with his raspy tone. Her eyes turning to slits, but he continued. "You better take cover, Lil, I'm sure it won't be long before the four horsemen arrive."

"Funny, Potter." -She said, trying to keep a straight face –but her lips twitched. "Don't push your luck."

She tried to glare at him but the smell coming from him was too intoxicating. It was like rain and grass and mint all thrown together and it went from her nose directly to the hairs in the back of her neck. She threw another paper ball into the fire and closed her eyes taking a deep breath, at the same trying to get Petunia out of her head and enjoying his scent. It really didn't help. She didn't really remember why they were meeting anymore, her mind unable to focus with so many conflicting emotions. It was always hard to focus when James was around but now her brain couldn't settle on a topic, it kept going from lustful to angry, to sad, to infatuated then back to angry. She exhaled sharply and opened her eyes. He was looking directly at her, a pensive look on his striking features. She tried to smile and get herself together but the smile came out strangled. In one of those graceful silent movements only he could manage, he brought her head to rest on his chest, his large squared calloused hands stroking her red curls.

"Lil." -He said gently with a low tone that made her skin tingle. "I'm a bit worn out today, maybe we could just relax?"

She considered answering but instead adjusted herself on his torso and nodded. She didn't have to look to know he was smiling.

_**X - X - X - X - X - X**_

He looked at her, her head resting innocently on his chest, her long tresses splashed all over his shirt. Her sweet breath making her rise and fall slowly and rhythmically, lulling him to sleep. His large fingers twirled a lone curl and he wished he could make the moment last forever. It was silly, really, how much the simple fact of her body touching his made him feel just so... _whole_. Like he didn't notice that he had been missing a limb and someone just came and reattached it. She smelled faintly like cocoa and it just made him want to be even closer. She parted her lips a little and exhaled; the hot air settling in his shirt while her hands silently snaked to his back. He smiled at her, wishing there was any way he could help her with these complicated things that were family issues. He hadn't seen her cry, but he knew she had because her cheeks were lightly stained. She mumbled something quietly and shifted her weight from on side to the other while he tried to remain as still as possible so as to not break the magic. Minutes ticked by but he didn't notice. He didn't want to fall asleep but his eyelids were heavy. He wanted to stay awake, because he figured that, just this once, reality was better than fantasy.


	12. Chapter 12

_**Hello everyone! I'm really happy to be posting this chapter. I've worked extra hard on this one and hopefully you'll like it. I just want to take a sec to thank Sphynx, my wonderful beta that did a great job helping me out in this chapter (as she always does) and also say a big thanks to all of you that reviewed this story so far -I really can't say how helpful your comments are and how happy I am to get them. So, I hope you enjoy and, if you got a minute, please review and tell me what you think -so maybe I can do a better job next time. PA**_

**Chapter 12 - Wedding Crashers**

She felt silly when that first sneaky tear ran down her left cheek, but in the end it was her sister's wedding. Even if it was _Petunia_. Even if her sister looked liked an avalanche of satin, lace and faux pearls. She sighed and tried to get her concentration back to the ceremony. It was just _slow _and her heels were killing her; she was desperate to slip into something comfortable, like her old Converse. She fidgeted uncomfortably on her spot trying to find her lost focus. Her eyes scanned the seated audience briefly and fell on Alice. Thank God her mother had convinced her sister to let her bring a friend. Alice smiled and winked at her. She grinned back and mouthed "ouch" to her while pointing to her shoes. Her friend shook with silent laughter. She looked back to the marrying couple and noticed that her sister looked happy. Really happy. And that realization instantly made her feel better. She knew they didn't have the best relationship (far from it really, like _far far_), but it still mattered to her that _she_ was happy. Even if that meant marrying that walrus of a man. She didn't really get what Petunia saw in him (and she knew she wasn't alone in that department), but if it was what made her happy, then so be it.

She remembered when Vernon had first been introduced to the family –it had been a train wreck. In five minutes her parents had already decided they didn't like him (with all the conceited air and the relentless talk about drills) and while her mother had acted politely, her father had openly mocked him –not that the dunce noticed, mind you. She remembered Petunia was fuming when her boyfriend left but their father couldn't even be bothered to hide his dissatisfaction with the annoying boy. She wondered briefly how her parents would like James; even though he wasn't her boyfriend, the thought just came naturally. He _was_ incredibly charming (when he wanted to he could ooze that smarmy charm that only worked on him) and she knew that would sit well with her mother. But her father... that was another deal entirely. She sighed, wishing he could be there now. His simple presence made her feel better, lighter and now her addiction had spiked all the way up and she wasn't sure how she was going to make it through the entire weekend without seeing him, hearing his soothing voice.

She watched through the corner of her eyes when the minister started Saint Paul's speech about love (_love is never cruel, or selfish...)_ and a small smile played her lips. She remembered that Saturday night when she had fallen asleep in his arms. It was unsettling how much their bodies seemed fitted for each other even though he had a much larger frame. She loved the way her head fitted perfectly on the crook of his neck and how his large rough hands encased her tiny ones so delicately. She smiled slightly. She didn't think that existed something more beautiful than him sleeping, his strong jawline and perfect nose so at ease, his large chest heaving softly. When she had woken up in his arms later that night she pretended he was hers (because deep down she felt he already was) and instead of untangling herself from him, she had stayed in his embrace. She had stayed perfectly still for god knows how long and watched him sleep, her fingers traveling slowly to his face without her permission and caressing his cheeks, the light stubble rough under her smooth skin. The way it had felt to touch him, to be that close, was like a monster butterfly parade going on inside her. She was absolutely in love with how he felt. She had slid his glasses from his nose as carefully as she could and right then he had smiled and she had to fight back the urge to just throw caution to wind and kiss him. Because right then it was impossible not to wonder if her lips would fit perfectly against his, like everything else seemed to fit. And those damn dimples of his just made it harder to resist those uncalled urges. She had sighed profoundly. Those dimples were dangerous.

She noticed that now all the guests were standing and returned her attention to the main event. She could tell this was going to be the last part and she thanked the heavens because her feet were starting to go numb. Then the thought struck: the party. She closed her eyes for a few seconds at the prospect. At least four long hours of fraternizing with the Dursley's. Oh, the mere thought made her shiver. Vernon was boring, yes, but his family was absolutely batty. And it didn't help that they looked at her strangely, like there was something wrong with _her_, which was probably what Petunia had told them. The entire room rose to their feet and the minister pronounced those long awaited words: _you may kiss the bride._ There were some low cheers and very loud clapping. That was it; her sister was now Petunia Walrus. She felt the crowd move and immediately went back to look for Alice whilst at the same time looking for a discreet place to take off those murderous sandals. But then, then her eyes caught a glimpse of something unlikely and she had to lean against the pillar to steady herself and convince her poor brain that now was not the time to play tricks on herself. She had seen _his_ hair. His beautiful raven rebellious locks were unmistakable and she had seen them behind a tall fat bearded man in the back of the room. She exhaled sharply. _Don't be stupid, Lily. Of course he's not here._ But right then the fat man moved. And there, there he was.

**x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x**

There was a lot of convincing involved and it had required every bit of persuasion he had. McGonagall wasn't too keen on having both Heads out of school on the same day, but after a lot (and that meant a lot) of compromising promises and even a small amount of bribery (Godric only knew how many Galleons worth of chocolate he would have to buy Remus) he got it. So now he had to find his effing tie and he had to make his hair look, well, at least somewhat close to normal. And Merlin was he nervous. He didn't know if it would bode well with her, you know, crashing her sister's wedding, but after all the effort he couldn't back off at the last minute. He heard Sirius tapping his foot on the common room and tried to hurry along in his tie search but the darned thing was MIA. And he couldn't just wear his Gryffindor one, that would be too much of a tell. He exhaled sharply. No tie, than. Problem solved. He huffed and put his arm through his jacket. He couldn't be late, they had to meet up with Alice in about twenty minutes. He looked at his image in the mirror. He hoped he looked good, but even more so, he hoped he looked Muggle good. At least Remus had said that his suit was smart, so that was a step in the right direction. He walked down the stairs two at a time easily -his legs were long enough that it was effortless. His mate was waiting for him and they immediately started on their way to the meeting point. And he blessed Merlin for small miracles when Sirius didn't say anything about his lack of tie.

While he walked he thought about _her_. He remembered the past weeks; they had been amazing and nerve-wrecking at the same time. Ever since they had fallen asleep together that Saturday the air around them seemed filled with heavy sexual tension. She was always _always_ staring (even if she was trying very hard no to) and he couldn't deny his eyes were also following her around like magnets. And when they were together they would attempt to casually talk, but he kept spacing out of the conversation trying to think of an excuse to touch her while at the same time trying to restrain himself from doing so. Because really, lately it was everything he thought about. He couldn't help it, no matter how mature he was, he was still seventeen. And the way it had felt to have her so close, it gave him chills just thinking about it. And he tried, Merlin did he try, to act nonchalant about it and shake it off but he couldn't get over that feeling that his arms _belonged_ around her and if they were anywhere else they were just in the wrong place. He pushed a hand through his hair to try to make it flatter. He had a slight suspicion her parents wouldn't like their daughter to hang around a person with crazy hair but his was a lost cause. He smiled remembering the time Sirius had decided it was his mission to tame his wild locks but in the end proclaimed it to be bewitched because he didn't want to admit his utter failure. It hadn't been the most masculine way to pass the time, but it was worth it just to see his best friend fuming face in the end.

They were waiting now. They had to, since they didn't know where the shindig was going to happen. He was too fidgety to stay still so he kept pacing quietly and he knew he was driving his best mate slowly insane, but it didn't matter. He was nervous and anxious and excited and terrified all at the same time, because really he could be making a huge mistake imposing on her like this. He tried to relax, breathing in and out. In_ and _out. It was weird for him to feel this way; he usually was a self-assured person, but everything was different when _she_ was involved. He was a little worried about her: she didn't seem very into the wedding herself (maybe it was because her sister was a hag) and it felt like she had been dreading the day. He thought it showed her caring nature, that even though she clearly didn't get along with her sister, she still worried about her, because according to Lily, the bloke Petunia was marrying was a right _ass_ and she was incredibly put out by it. He bit his lip anxiously. He hoped his being there would be a good thing.

"Calm down, mate." -The voice of his best mate had a tinge of humor in it. "You look like you're the one about to get hitched."

"I know, I know."- He said chuckling. "It's just... I hope she won't kill me..."

"She won't. But if she tries to... well, that's why I'll be there." -Sirius said patting his shoulder.

"Bring back my remains, will you, Pads?"

"Sure thing, mate."

And right then, there was a loud pop and her best friend was there. And even though he knew it was a dressed up event he was startled because Alice looked really pretty in her soft green outfit and he couldn't help grinning. He couldn't wait to see Lily.

**x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x**

She stared at him like he was an alien. He didn't look like any of the men in the room even if he was wearing a suit. He looked taller and sleeker and his hair was as tame as she had ever seen it and his light blue shirt had exactly the right shade to compliment his tanned skin. His glasses were different and he was smiling that crooked smile of his that made her knees wobble. And the dimples. It was always the dimples that killed her. She held the pilaster while a long relieved smile spread on her lips. _He was really there_. No hallucination, thank God. And just then, everything was just _so... perfect._ She felt like she had been sucked into one of those cheesy movies where everyone else looked bland and gray and he looked absolutely flawless. And it felt so surreal. She watched as he walked towards her through the crowd with his usual graceful posture. It was really unfair that he seemed to pull off everything so easily. She was always a klutz, bumping into everything and everyone in the near vicinity and his movements were always so easy, so timed. While he walked she saw that her sister's friends were following him with their eyes. She wanted to slap them, of course, but she couldn't really blame them. He was, after all, very staring-worthy. She narrowed her eyes at a petite blond in a horrid pink dress that was ogling him with hungry eyes and she very nearly hissed at the tacky girl. She was vaguely aware that Sirius was there as well; she had seen his form surrounded by another blob of girls, but her eyes were glued to _his_ form. She was half ecstatic and half terrified that he was there. And so far she didn't know which part would overcome the other.

She watched closely as he stood aside so that an elderly guest could leave. Even the old woman couldn't help but stare at him. She looked at him interestedly and he smiled at her politely. He really should not have done that, she thought. The old lady was taken aback by his smile and very nearly lost her already fragile balance. He steadied her with his quick reflexes and the woman seemed frozen for a few moments. Lily couldn't help but chuckle; it seemed he had that effect on everybody –it didn't matter what age. She stared as he talked briefly to the elder, probably asking if she was ok, and then restarted his path to her. His poor victim followed him intently with her eyes. James Potter, she thought, would always be the center of attention, no matter where he went. She looked at him, appraising him. He had made an effort to look Muggle and she wasn't in the least bit surprised that he had pulled it off. He always did. But it was his air that gave him away. He just had that aura and people automatically knew he was special, that he was different. It had taken her a long time for her finally admit that, because to her he had always been that skinny annoying boy with the glasses, but once she saw it, it became an undeniable fact. And then he was there, in front of her. And he was smiling sheepishly, as if unsure of her reaction, and her heart began to beat erratically because dear Merlin in those short couple of days she had missed him so. She was sure she looked like an idiot, gripping that pillar as though her life depended on it and her mouth still slightly agape from the shock that he was _right there_.

"Hi." -He said timidly.

"Hey." -She returned with great effort.

"Lily?"

"You're here." -And she let out a breath she hadn't realized she had been holding while her hand procured his shoulder on its own.

**x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x**

He had never seen her look so beautiful, and that in itself was saying something. The way her deep blue dress hugged her body should just be forbidden, because though it wasn't tight you could almost guess the perfection it hid. The small pleats on the top made her delicate shoulders seem even more fragile and the flowy skirt framed her hips in the exact measure to drive him up the wall. He bit his lip painfully trying to think about why he was there: he was there to help her through it. And he wasn't going to let his mind go wondering to those _other_ territories. Her beautiful hair was put up in a neat ponytail and a casual looking bang framed her face. And she was wearing make up, which she almost never did. And he thought that, really, it was unfair to any other girl in the place to have her close by. His breath sped up when she saw him and smiled, relief washing over him like a long awaited tide. It didn't look like she was going yell. He started moving towards her almost immediately, his eyes steady in her figure. He stood aside when an old lady got up and he gave her a stiff smile trying to hide his impatience. He missed her. It had only been a day and a half but he had missed her terribly. He had missed coming back from his run that day and finding her in their common room, the space filled with that cocoa smell she carried everywhere. That easy smile on her lips silently saying she had been waiting for him. The elderly woman finally moved and he restarted his way towards her. And then, finally, they were together again.

As they walked together to the reception he gently put his hand on the small on her back to lead her to the right. The simple touch made electricity rush through his body violently and he had to make an effort to act as though nothing had happened. He noticed that the very blond hairs in her arm were standing up and smiled. Maybe he wasn't the only to notice the electricity between them. He was now at ease again, it was all he needed: to be close to her. But he could feel she was still tensed up. Maybe it was because her sister had gotten married and she did not care for the husband, or maybe it was because they were walking up to a room filled with her relatives. Together. Or maybe it was a combination of both. Either that or he had no idea.

As they walked talking quietly, her hand brushed his and she blushed heavily. Merlin, he loved that. He loved that now he seemed to have the same effect on her she had always had on him. And to be honest he loved the way she looked when she blushed, it was just too damn adorable -maybe that was why he kept pushing her buttons all those years: to see her tinge that adorable shade of red. When they finally arrived, their mates were waiting and they joined them in conversation. His eyes kept stealing glances of her face and his hand kept drifting towards her, until at one point he decided it was better to just stuff them in his pockets. Less risky.

He and Sirius decided it was best not to congratulate the new couple, because they might notice they didn't know either of them, so they went to get a table. Which meant that Sirius was going to scout his primary targets and his own personal mission was to spike the punch. He walked calmly back to a more hidden table, all the while his eyes trying to soak in all that Muggle information. It was so different from the parties he was used to going, but still it felt the same way. He snorted. It had always been like that for him, he went to all those functions his parents participated in and he always felt out of place, because he was too young, or too bored, or maybe because he didn't really get why all those people were there pretending to be important, pretending to themselves, really. He didn't _get_ it. And even though today was different, it was just the same. He could see the way the Dursley's behaved, like they meant something. But the they only fooled themselves. And he watched as she waited her turn to talk to her sister. It was as if she was standing in a completely separate place, a whole other level. And she turned to look at him only to find him staring at her. She blushed again and he winked at her. She smiled and turned back to talk to her friend. Lily was definitely on a different level, he just hoped she didn't notice -it was way above his.

**x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-xx-x-x-x-**

The rest of the party seemed to pass on a blur for her. She remembered her sister giving her the evil eye when all her friends seemed to fawn over Sirius Black. She shrugged it off: it really wasn't her fault, and there wasn't much she could do about it. She sighed when she saw for the umpteenth time that day her neighbor's daughter walk by James' side and flash him a suggestive smile, but he didn't even notice and that made _her_ smile. She started to move calmly in his direction, trying to look as slick as she could in those heels (her blasted mother had not allowed her to take the bloody things off). And when she was nearly half way over she noticed someone had beat her to him. Her father. She bit her lip anxiously and saw her mother join them. Her breath hitched and she stared, frozen, as the threesome talked naturally. He seemed so at ease, she could not help but smile bewildered. And thank Jesus and all available saints for his easy going confident nature. She watched as he shook her father's hand and the couple began to move away. While they were walking towards the dance floor her mother caught her eye and gave her a satisfied meaningful look. It made her blush from head to toe, that look her mum sent her, and even though she didn't know exactly what had happened, she just knew he had passed. Apparently with flying colors, like he did everything else.

She closed her eyes for a moment and waited for her breathing to resume its normal rate. When she looked up, he was looking at her with an amused expression. She felt her lips twitch into a smile: she loved when he had that mischievous look. He grinned and pointed to a place in a secluded corner. She nodded. He grabbed a bottle of wine that had been sitting innocently on the table and two glasses and smoothly moved to the appointed place. She watched marveled his elegant figure retreating into the shadows. And when he was gone it took her a few seconds to realize she was supposed to follow, so with a a pleased grin and a start she did exactly that.

When she thought about it she noticed she didn't know exactly how or why but they where dancing. But frankly, that didn't seem very important at the moment. She let her eyes shut slightly and rested her cheek in his shoulder as he swayed them both to the slow music. His long arms rested on her tiny waist and she could smell the scent that was so _him_, and that made everything ok. She smiled a tiny smile because he was just there. Her left hand rested on his right shoulder and she could just feel the magic that hung in the air. And she knew that moment was going to be one of those she remembered when she was old and grey. So she opened her eyes to look at him and tried to engrave in her memory everything she could about the beautiful boy that has holding her. Their eyes met and she was certain he was doing exactly the same.

It was strange to think of how when the day had begun, she had dreaded it. She had deliberately made everything slowly, prolonging each minute to its furthest. She had gotten dressed in a zombie state and had pretended that it was just another party and promised herself she would endure all the mean comments and the annoying stares because it was Petunia's day, and no matter how much they struggled with each other, she wasn't going to be petty. But now, now everything was different. He is there and it feels like nothing can touch her. And she knows that no one will ever make her feel so safe and so _beautiful_. Because really he looks at her with those eyes every day and the way he looks at her, it never changes. And she knows that people are going to notice she's gone, and she'll have to answer a million uncomfortable questions, but right then she just can't bring herself to give a damn. Not when his lips are so close his warm breath washes over her. All she seems to be able to care about is _him_.

And they keep dancing for the longest time and she is pretty sure the song has changed and they look insane dancing to a different rhythm but he doesn't seem to notice, so why should she? And he twirls her around slowly and they laugh together like the seventeen year olds they are. And she can't stop smiling because she really can't remember being that _happy._ She keeps her eyes on him now all the time, no longer ashamed to be caught, because she doesn't want to miss anything, not the way his eyes twinkle when her hand presses on his shoulder not the way his hair is slowly rebelling against the partial flatness he had managed earlier. And she doesn't miss when he looks at her that way that says everything and they both are silent for a moment and time stops. And his hand caresses her cheek and her chin jolts up and he smiles that crooked grin and the fearsome dimples appear. And she knows she is lost forever, because when his lips gently touch hers for the first time (and like everything else they fit together _perfectly_), she just feels pure _bliss._


End file.
